Poll: Most Americans Would Rather Have 4 More Years of Coronavirus Than Trump

As the country sits on the edge of its seat and holds its collective breath wondering if a pandemic outbreak of the novel coronavirus will take hold, a new poll’s results show that, perhaps surprisingly, more Americans are worried about the effects of four more years of a Donald Trump presidency than a four year outbreak. Over the course of last week, polling company We Poll You So Hard teamed up with CNBC and surveyed 1550 likely U.S. voters and found the majority of them would trade four years of a coronavirus outbreak for four more years of the Trump administration being in charge.

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Strikingly, seven out of ten surveyed, a full 70%, said that if they had a choice between dealing with an outbreak of the coronavirus or four more years of President Trump’s leadership, they would choose the virus “in a heartbeat.” We Poll You’s chief of research said on a Sunday morning talk show this morning that she’s “never seen results so conclusive” in the 30 years she’s been doing public opinion polling. The country is polarized and divided on several issues, she said, but when it comes down to the question of an outbreak that kill millions and keeping a D-list reality TV star and lifelong con man in office, “there’s no competition,” she said.

“We can’t get people to agree that indoor plumbing is a good thing in this country,” Dr. Susan Susanovich told the roundtable panel on the show this morning, “but a rather astounding number of people we talked to all agreed that a four year long outbreak of the coronavirus is much more preferable to another term for President Trump.”

65% Say They’d Rather Coronavirus Be President Than Trump

“What’s really fascinating, looking at the results,” Susanovich explained, “is that nearly the same number of people would also rather just hand the nuclear codes to the coronavirus and let it be president. Obviously, I’m a researcher and not a constitutional scholar, but it would appear that if Democrats give their nomination to the coronavirus this fall, it has a better than average shot at beating him. I’m not saying the virus can take the oath, but it would seem that a lot of Americans believe it would actually uphold it, unlike Trump.”

Digging into the numbers a bit more, Susanovich says that in a head-to-head contest between Trump and the coronavirus, the virus comes out on top given most issues.

“A full 59% believe that the coronavirus is more trustworthy than Trump, and 68% say they think it’s less dangerous to the safety and well-being of their fellow Americans,” Susanovich said. “This really is quite interesting, to think that the majority of Americans would feel safer with a deadly virus in the Oval Office than a cancer on the presidency remaining in it.”

55% Would Willing Infect Themselves With Coronavirus If It Meant Trump Left The White House Forever

What Susanovich calls the “most compelling conclusion” from her company’s poll is just how many people would volunteer to be infected with the coronavirus, if it meant that Donald Trump would leave the Oval Office forever.

“Infecting yourself with a virus that has a chance, even a relatively small one, of killing you is quite a sacrifice to make for any desired outcome,” Susanovich explained to the show’s guests. “So it’s not surprising that fewer people were willing to sign-up for a coronavirus infection to get Trump out of the Oval office but there’s still nearly 6 in every 10 people we talked to that would do exactly that. If Trump promised he’d quit the presidency if they infected themselves, they’d do it. I don’t know about you, but that sounds mighty heroic and noble to me.”

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.

James Schlarmannhttp://www.facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

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