Obama Hopes Biden Remembers How to Take Everyone’s Guns, Jobs, and Bibles

UNDISCLOSED SHARIA COMMIE SOCIALIST BUNKER, SOROSLAND — It’s been four long years since Agenda 666 has been implemented, and former President Barack HUSSEIN Obama (D-Kenya) hopes that his old ticketmate, incoming President-elect Joe Biden “remembers his training” and can successfully get the program started back up.

“Order 666 was of course the Obama executive order that gave the federal government permission to take away someone’s guns, job, or Christian Bible,” Presidential Historian Doris Kearns Goodwin said during a Sunday morning talk show appearance today. “It’ll be interesting to see if Obama’s old friend Joe can restart the program that Order 666 began. When Obama left office, as everyone knows, he left without a single gun being in the hands of an American citizen, but now there’ve been four years of unfettered access to firearms that Biden will have to address, if Order 666 is to be carried out once more.”

RELATED: Georgia Runoff Defeats Break Ancient Spell and McConnell’s Dick Turns Back Into Lump of Coal

- Advertisement -

In an email leaked to several media outlets and culinary blogs, Obama writes to Biden and asks him if he “still remembers the proper procedures and protocols” for confiscating guns from law abiding Americans.

“Joe, are you ready? Is there anything you need to brush up on before you take office,” Obama writes to Biden. “Master Soros made it quite clear that Order 666 is still very much so in effect, and he’s going to want weekly updates on how many guns you’ve taken away. If you need to the new combination to the warehouse where we put all the guns we’ve grabbed, let me know, Joe.”

This morning, former President Obama was asked about his email to Biden while doing an interview on MSNBC.

“Now, uh, look…there are certain, shall we say…agenda items…that need to be addressed because there have been four long years without any gun grabbing,” Obama said. “That’s something Master Soros and I are very aware of, and the executive board of Antifa, Inc. has quotas and deadlines that’ll never get reached if Joe doesn’t hit the ground running, or grabbing as it were, in this case.”

MORE: Trump Already Broke New Year’s Resolution to Not Be a Fucking Moron

- Advertisement -

 

Like what you read? Consider signing up for my free newsletter, becoming a paid Facebook subscriber, or signing up for my Patreon.

Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.

- Advertisement -

Leave a reply

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here