McEnany: She’ll Put Jan 6 Subpoena on the Mantle Next to Her Autographed Pic of Trump’s Dong

The subpoena she receives from the January 6th select congressional committee will be given a place of “distinction and honor,” according to former White House Press Secretary and vapid blonde fuckmuppet Kayleigh McEnany.

On Fox News this morning, McEnany acknowledged that she was among a new group of former Trump officials who received an official demand for testimony before the committee looking into the deadly events of the January 6th failed coup attempt. McEnany, former White House Head Nazi Vampire Cunt Stephen Miller, and Trump spokesman Jason Miller were all included in the bipartisan committee’s spate of subpoenas. It’s unclear how far the committee is willing to go to enforce their subpoenas, as bridge troll Steve Bannon has flouted his own subpoena for a couple of weeks.

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McEnany did not give any indication as to whether she intends to comply with it, but she did tell the morning hosts where she would be displaying her subpoena.

“It’s gonna get a real place of high distinction and honor in the home, that’s for sure. I’m going to put it right up there on my mantle,” McEnany announced.

“I think it’ll look just swell sitting next to the other things on my mantel. My law degree, pictures of my child, and of course, my post prized mantel addition — my autographed picture of President Donald John Trump’s totally normally sized and shaped penis.”

McEnany said she briefly considered putting the subpoena in other places around her home, but that the mantle seemed “just right.”

“At one point I thought about putting it on our fridge, next to the finger paintings Eric gave us for Christmas last year,” McEnany explained.

“When I thought about it, though, I just thought it would make so much more sense to have the subpoena next to the sub-par penis.”

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.

James Schlarmann
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

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