Guy Who Put Out “Pray 4 Assassin” Obama Dummy Outraged by Kathy Griffin Trump Beheading

LAKE DICKERDILDO, NEW JERSEY — William Smitherton is a self-described “news personality” who runs or helps run several right-leaning social media channels. Primarily, Smitherton puts his work out on Facebook via a page and podcast he created called “Biased in All the Right Ways.” In an episode of his podcast that dropped today, Smitherton unleashed an angry tirade at comedian Kathy Griffin for her shocking “beheading” photo that depicts Griffin holding a fake severed head that is obviously representative of Donald Trump’s head.

“This is insanity, this violent craziness from the left has to stop,” Smitherton barked into his microphone, “and if the libtards don’t stop being violent themselves, we may have to gun up, know what I mean? Because liberals aren’t qualified to use violence to make their point, but conservatives know violence sometimes is the only answer to conflicts. It’s different. I don’t have to tell you, fam.”

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Smitherton insisted that he “never, ever, ever” saw anything from the right that “remotely came close to shitting on Obama” like Griffin’s picture did.

“Sure, you’d see us calling him a Muslim monkey and stuff,” Smitherton conceded, “but that’s racist, not violent. And before any libtarded libtard gets on my chat or my phone line telling me about how they saw Obama hung in effigy, that’s also way, way different. For reasons and stuff.”

William recalled for his audience a comparable situation from his own life, back when Barack Obama was president.

“This reminds me of the time I put out that dummy with an Obummer mask on it with a sign that read, ‘Pray 4 Assassin’ on it,” William remembered, “It was a free speech issue then because I’m a patriot and I love the First Amendment. But clearly Griffin’s photo is a crime, should be treated as such, and she should go to jail for probably the rest of her adult life for this. Why? Because liberalism is a mental disease, makers and takers, and these colors don’t run, obviously. Oh, also, because freedom isn’t free and America first, of course.”

Smitherton says  that Griffin’s apology is “meaningless” to him.

“I don’t care if she apologized and I or Trump never have! It’s not my fault she’s a pussy who can’t stand by her words, and it’s not my fault that everything we do is correct, sanctioned by the Constitution, and above reproach.”

You can follow James on Twitter @JamesSchlarmann.

James Schlarmann
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

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