Washington

Entire Population of The Dakotas Shuts Down Single Starbucks to Protest D.C. Statehood

Today, the House of Representatives voted along party lines to advance House Resolution 51, which would make Washington, D.C. the official 51st state in the union. The bill has a long uphill battle to climb in order to become...

Do We Live in America Anymore If There Aren’t Any Racist Team Mascots?

This week, the Cleveland Indians, one of Major League Baseball's longest running franchises, announced that very soon it would be dropping the word "Indians" and adopting a new name. There have been other professional baseball teams in Cleveland that...

Redskins Rename Themselves to Honor Those Offended by Team’s Name Change

After almost nine decades using it, the nickname of the NFL team based in the nation's capital will change permanently, sometime soon. MORE: CDC Study Shows Wearing a Mask Reduces Spreading Selfish Douchebaggery by 100% According to team officials, the Washington...

Putin Unsure He’ll Invite Trump to D.C. 4th of July Celebration

MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Over the weekend, President Donald Trump announced that -- for the very first time in the 243 years since its founding, the United States would celebrate the 4th of July in a big way. Most readers, of...

Chemtrail Learning Center Expands Into Amusement Park

Seattle, WA -- The Washington State-based Evergreen Chemtrail Learning Center (ECLC) announced today that they plan on expanding its 4-year-old learning center to include amusement rides and other attractions. Opened in 2013 with the help of a sizable 25...

School Shooting Victim’s Mother Asks Trump If His Travel Ban Would’ve Kept Her Daughter Alive

Her daughter was cut down by a gunman's bullet in a school shooting earlier this year, and now this woman wants answers from Trump.

Washington Man Smokes Legal Weed, Nothing Really Happens

One man in Washington state smoked legal weed recently, and what happened next may shock and surprise people...who have never tried pot.

Paul Ryan: Lowering Minimum Wage to $0 an Hour Will Get 0% Unemployment

Speaker Paul Ryan has a radical new theory for how to encourage full employment -- completely eliminating the minimum wage.
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Donald Trump Finding Out

Well...shit. How didĀ thisĀ end up happening, anyway? Doesn't everyone indicting him understand the rules have never, and never will apply...
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