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Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
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Science & Medicine

Tyrant Biden Commands Restaurant Employees to Wash Hands After Using the Bathroom

"What about my freedom to get sick and die, fam? WHAT THE FUCK ABOUT...
Science & Medicine

New Policy Lets DeSantis Punch Kids in the Mouth for Wearing a Mask

TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- A new policy instituted by Gov. Ron DeSantis (Q-FL) allows him...
Science & Medicine

All The Ways You’re Not An Idiot For Comparing Federal Labor Guidelines on Vaccinations to the Holocaust

So, you find yourself outraged and incensed that your government doesn't function like it's...
Science & Medicine

Duly Elected Tyrant Uses Lawful Constitutional Authority to Give OSHA New COVID Vaccine Mandate

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A stunned MAGA nation looked on in horror yesterday as Comrade...
Science & Medicine

Dear Libs: Stop Shaming Morons Who Take Livestock Drugs Instead of a Free Vaccine

The following editorial was written by conservative talk radio host Dustin Pewpson. The views...
Conservative Media

Dr. Alex Jones Prescribes 30 mg of Chemtrails and Frog De-Gayer for Joe Rogan’s COVID

FT. DIPSHIT, TEXAS -- Yesterday, to the shock of absolutely nobody who passed high...
Science & Medicine

Greene’s Vet Begs Her Not to Take COVID Vaccine for Heartworms

EQUINE HILLS, GEORGIA -- Freshman Congresshorse Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) was forced to see...
Science & Medicine

Local Moron Sees Inconvenience as Tyranny

LAKE SKIPPY, TENNESSEE -- Jack "Dipshit" McPhuckphace is known throughout his sleepy town as...
Science & Medicine

Greene Demands an Update From the FDA on Approval of Bleach and Sunlight Injections

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- After months of waiting, the Food and Drug Administration finally gave...
Science & Medicine

DeSantis Orders All Florida High Schoolers to Participate in Unvaccinated Make-Out Parties

TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- Gov. Ron DeSantis (Q-FL) has issued an ultimatum to every high...
Science & Medicine

CDC: Increased Risk of COVID Infection After Exposure to Blathering, Right-Wing Morons

ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- The CDC held an urgent press conference this morning during which...
MAGA News

Unvaccinated America First Patriot Refuses to Wear a Mask or Condom While Raw-Dogging His Cousin

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- In an interview soon to be published in American...
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Latest articles

Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...
Lifestyle

Because of DEI, My Black Friends Don’t Like My Confederate Flag Collection No More

The following editorial was written by right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Q. Bohiggins. The...

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