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Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
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Lifestyle

Man Finds Ted Cruz Drowning and Throws Him a Cement Life Preserver

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While it's not clear at this time exactly why Senator Ted...
MAGA News

National Association of A-Holes Kicks Cruz Out Over His Role in Stoking Capitol Riot

CULERO, TEXAS -- The National Association of A-Holes has decided to expel one of...
MAGA News

Cruz Says He and His Ugly Wife Are Appalled By Pro-Trump Violent Mob He Incited

WASHINGTON, D.C.  -- Just days before the violent pro-Trump mob ransacked the capitol building,...
MAGA News

Ted Cruz Hands Arsonist Gas and Matches and Tells Him to Stop Setting Fire to Stuff

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- He would later tell reporters he "wasn't quite sure what ...
U.S. Politics

Cruz Will Insist That Congress Certify He Has an Ugly Wife and No Balls

This story first appeared on The Pastiche Post and is reprinted with permission. Before the 2016 presidential...
U.S. Politics

Cruz Warns Democrats Might Try to Steal Future Elections With More Votes than Republicans

This story was first published by our sister publication, The Pastiche Post, and is reprinted...
U.S. Politics

Ted Cruz Will Demand Congress Certify He’s a Ball-less Douche With an Ugly Wife

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Before the 2016 presidential race, Sen. Ted Cruz had a wife...
Conservative Media

Chanel Rion, Sean Hannity, Ted Cruz Argue Over What Exactly Donald Trump’s Taint Tastes Like

It got ugly, it got heated, and sixteen hours later, three of President Donald...
Criminal Justice

Last Week, Ted Cruz Met With Trump’s Balls for a Supreme Court Argument Strategy Sesh

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Supreme Court of the United States will not hear the...
U.S. Politics

Cruz Warns Democrats Might Try to Steal Future Elections With More Votes than Republicans

RIO PINCHE CULERO, TEXAS -- Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Trump's Taint) warned Americans during a...
MAGA News

Trump Still Hasn’t Said When Or If He’ll Return Rubio’s, Cruz’s, and Graham’s Balls

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Over the course of his first and only presidential term, Donald...
MAGA News

Cruz Awaits Poll Closings and News About Whether His Wife Will Be Ugly Another Four Years

FUCKFACE, TEXAS -- Canadian-born-Super-Texan-Cowboy-Elite-Ivy-League-Lawyer Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) told his staff this morning during...
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Latest articles

Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...

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