Tag: Ted Cruz

POLL: Majority Relieved to Find Out Future President’s Dong is Okay

Donald Trump thankfully cleared up any misconceptions about his penis in the last GOP ...

As President, Ted Cruz Would Stop Cutting Crusts of GI’s PB&J’s

Ted Cruz doesn't want soldiers eating gluten-free meals, and he wants their sandwiches to ...

Donald Trump, Ted Cruz Agree U.S. Should Get ‘Dibs’ on Gravitational Waves

Two Republican candidates agree on which country should control the newly discovered gravitational waves.