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Ted Cruz

Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
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The Democrats

Republicans Race to Defend One of Their Own After Bathroom Confrontation

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Congressional Republicans have begun to close ranks and circle the wagons...
Science & Medicine

Cruz: “As Soon as Trump Gives Them Back, I’ll Know If Getting Vaccinated Changed My Balls”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last week, noted virologist and "Wet Ass Pussy" composer Nicki Minaj...
Women's Rights

Cruz Reminds Constituents That The ‘Back Door Means No Babies and No Abortions’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The American right-wing, particularly those in Evangelical circles, have been pushing...
World News

Cruz: “America Needed a Draft Dodger With Bone Spurs Leading the Afghanistan Withdrawal”

"What this entire debacle has taught is something really quite simple to understand. America...
U.S. Politics

Cruz: “Donald Trump Understood That The Constitution is For Cucks”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This weekend Sen. Dick Durbin (D-IL) appeared on CNN and divulged...
The Democrats

Cruz: “Why Is Joe Biden So Afraid to Call My Wife Ugly?”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senator Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) blasted President Joe Biden today, accusing him...
MAGA News

Scientists Unable to Predict if Ted Cruz Can Evolve Past Booger-Eating Fascist Stage

To say that Ted Cruz's political career is unique would be an understatement, given...
MAGA News

Data Suggests Literally Nobody Gives a Fuck What Ted Cruz Thinks About Anything

Does anybody in America actually give a fuck what Senator Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) thinks...
World News

Cruz Slams Texas Dems For Not Asking to Borrow His Cancun Timeshare

Democrats in the Texas State Senate have once again taken to extreme measures to...
MAGA News

Cruz: America Needs a President ‘Who Can Think Outside the Constitution Again’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last night, former President Trump held a rally in Ohio, which...
Immigration

Cruz: “Why Hasn’t The Vice President Visited the Border So We Can Criticize What She Does There?”

Appearing on Newsmax TV, Sen. Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) lashed out at Vice President Kamala...
MAGA News

All His Past Lovers Can’t Believe Don Trump’s Dong Was Big Enough to Block January 6th Commission

"I mean, just based on the VERY SMALL amount of time I spent with...
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Latest articles

Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...

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