Rush Limbaugh

Trump Tells Bongino He’s ‘Almost as Good as Rush and Ivanka’ at Sucking Him Off

Today, disgraced former Secret Service agent and multiple-failed congressional candidate Dan Bongino took over for Rush Limbaugh, who has still yet to buy his way out of his death from stage four lung cancer a few months ago. For...

Through Tears of Joy, Lung Cancer Tells Radio Audience Its Stage 4 Limbaugh Infection Has ‘Almost Run Its Course’

CHINGADERO GORDO, FLORIDA -- Fighting through tears of joy, Lung Cancer told its radio audience today that it was "pleased and excited" to announce that its Stage 4 Limbaugh infection is "nearly over" and that it has "almost run...

Trump Drinks Bleach, Tucker Carlson Calls It ‘Second Most Impressive Thing’ Any President Has Done

There is nothing Donald Trump does that is wrong, bad, stupid, dangerous, or idiotic. At least according to super unbiased Tucker Carlson.

Jesse Watters Tells Fox News Audience Bill O’Reilly Left Him ‘Big Shoes to Fill and Huge Boobs to Grope’

Following in his mentor's footsteps is proving to be kind of difficult for the newest Fox News star, Jesse Watters. Sad. So sad.

After 2016, God Says He’s Having His ‘Aim Re-calibrated’

Larry "God" Schumway says he feels terrible about how bad his aim was in 2016 and promises to have it rectified for 2017.

Rush Limbaugh ‘Mad as Hell’ About Obama’s Facebook Page

Obama's Facebook Page has Rush Limbaugh seething.

Paul Ryan: “HJ-a-Day” is Deal Breaker for His Speaker Run

Paul Ryan has a LOT of historically significant demands in order to accept the role of Speaker of the House.

How One Man’s Straight Marriage Was Totally Ruined By Gay Marriage

One man's harrowing ordeal, losing his straight marriage to gay marriage.

5 Things That Are Definitely NOT On the Palin Brawl Police Report

The police report about the Alaskan Palin Brawl has been released, but let's talk about what you'd never find on that document, shall we?
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Tennessee Man Cleans Up Quickly After Spanking It to Avoid Charges of Attempted Murder

It's not that he would lie around, languishing in the self-extracted afterglow. But now that it seems like the...
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