Ron DeSantis

Disney Exec: Company Has Years of Meaningful Experience Dealing With Grumpy Dwarfs

During an investor conference call last week, Disney executives were confident that their company will prevail against Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. Mr. DeSantis aggressively targeted Disney, who happens to be his state's largest single site employer, because they publicly disagreed...

Naming Marjorie Taylor Greene His VP Would Double the IQ of Trump’s Ticket to 46

Former President Donald Trump really wants to make an attempt at a third popular vote loss in next year's presidential election. Though Trump has his sights set on the White House, there is still much about his legal status...

DeSantis Orders Disney World to Immediately Reverse “Splash Mountain” Update

Imagineers at Walt Disney World have one week from today to immediately halt and reverse any changes that have already been made to the ride known as "Splash Mountain," according to a new executive decree signed by Florida Governor...

Cruz Withholding 2024 Endorsement Until He Hears Every Candidate’s Stance on His Ugly Wife

Though the next presidential election is still over a year away, the machinations involved in selected the two major parties' nominees has already begun in earnest. This week, President Joe Biden officially announced he was running for re-election, and he...

Disney Building Drag Bar Next to Florida Governor’s Mansion

Another salvo has been fired in the war between Florida's biggest single site employer and its governor, Republican Generalissimo Ronald DeSantis. This time, the shot came from The Walt Disney Company toward DeSantis, after the governor announced this week...

DeSantis Signs Law Giving Parental Rights to Rapists Six Weeks After Rape

"Obviously, Ron DeSantis is a friend to Florida's rapists..."  - Chad Beefington, Rapists Rights Activist. Ever since he won re-election, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis has had a gloves-off approach to social policies in the Sunshine State. In recent months, the conservative...

DeSantis Bans “Fast and Furious” Movies in Florida

"...when he found out that the Fast and Furious movies are literally about a bunch of men doing drag, he sprung into action." Governor Ron DeSantis signed an official order today that bans the showing of any movie from the "Fast and...

DeSantis Bars Students from Learning About Trump’s Arrest or Indictment

Today, former President Donald J. Trump was arrested and arraigned on 34 felony charges stemming from the 2016 presidential campaign and a $130,000 hush money payment to porn star Stormy Daniels, but students in Florida will never learn about...

DeSantis Bans Minecraft Because ‘Kids Can Get Hoes’ In It

Gov. Ron DeSantis of Florida has used much of his second term in office to publicly wage a series of cultural wars. DeSantis has signed laws aimed at curbing the kinds of subjects Floridian students learn about in public...

DeSantis Bans Depictions of Nude Baby Jesus in Florida

Just hours after a Tallahassee school principal was fired because parents complained their children were exposed to one of the most famous statues in human history, Governor Ron DeSantis has used that incident as justification to ban any and...
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Donald Trump Finding Out

Well...shit. How did this end up happening, anyway? Doesn't everyone indicting him understand the rules have never, and never will apply...
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