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Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...
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U.S. Politics

Sad Libertarian to Investigate Why Candidate No One Voted For is Dropping Out of Race

Rand Paul is quitting and that has this libertarian very upset, and believing in a conspiracy against him.
U.S. Politics

Huckabee, O’Malley Now Move to Sudden Death Penalty Kicks

Before they drop out, Martin O'Malley and Mike Huckabee must compete in a sudden death penalty kick round.
U.S. Politics

Ted Cruz: As President, If Anyone is Mean to Me, I’ll Just Walk Out of the Oval Office

Ted Cruz "joked" about walking out on the Fox News debate, but would he walk out on tough international dealings?
MAGA News

Reince Priebus Fashions Donald Trump Analogue Out of Bag of Farts for GOP Debate

Without Trump in tonight's debate, Reince Priebus was left to scramble for a solution.
U.S. Politics

Rand Paul in Iowa, Desperately Flailing Arms at Cameras Covering Donald Trump

Rand Paul is getting desperate; very desperate actually.
U.S. Politics

Carly Fiorina: Don’t Have an Abortion Because I Need More Political Props

Carly Fiorina says she loves children so much she needs to treat them like cheap props to show her commitment to them.
MAGA News

Trump Campaign Looking for Volunteer to be Shot

The Donald Trump campaign is looking to double-down on comments their candidate made about shooting someone and maintaining his lead in the polls.
MAGA News

Sources: Trump Asks Palin If She Ever Thinks About Banging Her Own Daughter Too

Donald Trump recently had a very personal question for his new bestie Sarah Palin.
MAGA News

Sarah Palin: Why Does Obama Keep Getting Bristol Pregnant?

Sara Palin is pretty sure the president knocked-up her daughter, but is this the first time?
MAGA News

Ben Carson, Carly Fiorina Agree to Carpool to Rest of Campaign Events

Ben Carson and Carly Fiorina have announced a new partnership.
MAGA News

Sarah Palin’s Trump Endorsement: A Translation for Smart People

Sarah Palin's endorsement of Donald Trump was every bit the rambling incoherent mess you'd expect, so we translated what we could for you.
MAGA News

Ted Cruz to Struggling Middle Class Americans: Just Get a Million Bucks from Goldman Sachs!

Ted Cruz and Goldman Sachs made a deal that Cruz thinks could help lift every American out of financial ruin.
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Latest articles

Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...
Lifestyle

Because of DEI, My Black Friends Don’t Like My Confederate Flag Collection No More

The following editorial was written by right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Q. Bohiggins. The...
MAGA News

The Easter Bunny Plans to Give Plan-B and Contraceptives to Red State Teenagers

"Did you know there have already been thousands of rape pregnancies as a result...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)