Tag: Rand Paul

Rand Paul Wonders If Black Lives Really Matter

WASHINGTON, D.C. — There is only one, single member of the Senate Republican caucus ...

Fauci Confirms Rand Paul is a ‘Flaming Douchebag With Absolutely Shitty Hair,’ Medically Speaking

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Medically speaking, Senator Rand Paul (R-Ayn Rand’s Overrated, Overwrought Bootyhole) is ...

Doctors Treating Rand Paul’s Coronavirus With Bootstraps, Thoughts, and Prayers

BOWLING GREEN, CUNTUCKY — This weekend, Senator Rand Paul (R-Kremlin) became the first sitting ...

Rand Paul: Trump Getting Putin’s Permission for Syrian Airstrike ‘Close Enough’ For Him

Many Senate Republicans suddenly find themselves okay with Trump warning Vladimir Putin before asking ...