Pat Robertson

God Tells Pat Robertson to “Suit Up and Fight for Putin If He Wants the End Times So Badly”

https://youtu.be/xL9fgrDcXr0 KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- This past weekend, fossilized human and retired televangelist Pat Robertson seemed to throw his support behind Russian President Vladimir Putin's illegal invasion of Ukraine, on biblical grounds. Speaking on his old television show, Robertson said...

Pat Robertson: God Will Warm Texas If He Stops Watching “Magic Mike” for Research Purposes Twelve Times a Week

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Living fossil and televangelist Pat Robertson often speaks to God about what's going in the United States. In particular, Robertson will dialogue with God about natural disasters and weather phenomenon. Usually, God tells Robertson exactly...

Pat Robertson Blames ‘Hot Men Doing Sexy Times on Each Other’s Fannies’ for California Wildfires

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has been watching the developments in California this week quite closely, however it's not the potential recall of Gov. Gavin Newsom (D) that has him so rapt. Instead, it's the multiple, serious,...

Pat Robertson: God Wants Republicans to ‘Crotch Check’ Student Athletes

The 80+ year old televangelist said Jesus told him personally he needs to protect the "integrity" of sports by feeling up student athletes before their games.

Pat Robertson Says God Will Send Hurricanes to All 50 States If ‘Gays Keep Getting Married’

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has an ominous warning for America: Stop letting the gays get married, or else God will flood all fifty states. Robertson was speaking on his Monday morning podcast, "Wake Up With Jesus," when...

Robertson: “If Jesus Died For Your Sins, The Least You Can Do Is Die For Trump’s Economy!”

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson hasn't done much to hide his support for President Donald Trump. Though Christ's teachings were for his disciples to "pay Caesar what is due Caesar and pay God what is due God,"...

Pat Robertson: “You Will Go To Hell for Loving Baby Yoda and Baby Jesus”

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has a stern warning for Christians who also consider themselves fans of the Star Wars franchise not to invest themselves too heavily in the sci-fi space opera. Robertson specifically was concerned about a new...

Pat Robertson: “Jesus Died For Your Sins. The Least You Can Do Is Die For Trump’s Economy.”

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson hasn't done much to hide his support for President Donald Trump. Though Christ's teachings were for his disciples to "pay Caesar what is due Caesar and pay God what is due God,"...

Pat Robertson Blames Coronavirus on 2015 Supreme Court Gay Marriage Decision

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- The United States Supreme Court ruled in favor of marriage equality almost five years ago, and it's taken that long for God to "clear His backlog of mortal sins punishable by mass death," televangelist Pat...

Pat Robertson Says COVID-19 is God’s Punishment for Supreme Court’s Marriage Equality Decision

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- The United States Supreme Court ruled in favor of marriage equality almost five years ago, and it's taken that long for God to "clear His backlog of mortal sins punishable by mass death," televangelist Pat...
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Donald Trump Finding Out

Well...shit. How did this end up happening, anyway? Doesn't everyone indicting him understand the rules have never, and never will apply...
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