Lt. Commander Jesus Herbert Christ Reports For Duty On First Day on Trump’s Religious Freedom Space Task Force

CAPEĀ CANVERAL, FLORIDA -- Lieutenant Commander Jesus Hubert Christ has officially checked in for his first day of duty in the newly minted joint "Religious Freedom and Space Task Force" created by the Donald Trump presidential administration. Christ is among hundreds...

Ted Cruz Wants NASA to Turn Old Shuttles into Chick-Fil-A’s

Senator Ted Cruz has a new idea to try and help the federal government make a little dough while also simultaneously knocking science and education.

Trump Says U.S. Didn’t Need Paris Accords Because NASA Found Planet Covfefe & We’ll Live There

Who needs Earth when you can trade it up for a newer, hotter planet? That's Trump's philosophy and why he ditched the Paris Accords.

President Trump Designates Trappist-1 Solar System As Construction Site For Death Star

The newly discovered exoplanets in the TRAPPIST-1 solar system will be the construction site for a new American battle station.

Trump Asks NASA To Verify Newly Discovered Planets Also Revolve Around Him

Co-President Donald Trump reached out to the "space nerds" at NASA to help him glean just how much he should care about the new planets.

Trump Directs NASA To Verify Which Planet Girls Go To When They Get More Stupider

Republicans may not have a reputation for being pro-science, but that doesn't mean Trump won't be taking an active role in NASA's missions.

NASA Scientists Still Unable To Locate Edge Of Trump’s Stupidity

Where does Trump's stupidity end? NASA hopes to find out.

Donald Trump Says As President He’d Annex Jupiter

"If that doesn't work out, we just take NASA into Chapter 11."

Donald Trump, Ted Cruz Agree U.S. Should Get ‘Dibs’ on Gravitational Waves

Two Republican candidates agree on which country should control the newly discovered gravitational waves.

Ted Cruz: Mars Water Supply Proves Girls Go To Jupiter to Get More Stupider

There's water on Mars and Sen. Ted Cruz believes it means something universal about life itself.
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Tennessee Man Cleans Up Quickly After Spanking It to Avoid Charges of Attempted Murder

It's not that he would lie around, languishing in the self-extracted afterglow. But now that it seems like the...
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