Melania Trump

Ivanka, Jared, Eric, and Don Jr ‘Disappointed’ Hunter Biden Used His Name for Personal Gain

If there is one thing that everyone knows about the crotch-fruit of Donald Trump, it's that they absolutely loathe and despise any form of nepotism, and are outraged when they see someone using their famous name and wealthy, well-connected...

Donald Trump Has Been Reinstated as President. Of the Mar-A-Lago Buffet Line.

Finally, after almost two years of waiting, it happened. His wishes came true. The truth came out. He has been vindicated. Donald Trump is once more president. Of the Mar-A-Lago Buffet Line. MORE: Greene Says She Identifies as ‘Madison Cawthorn But...

Melania Trump’s Husband Only Interested in Ivanka’s NFT

Today, former Third First Lady Melania Trump announced that she was entering the world of NFTs. Mrs. Trump's NFT will feature watercolor paintings of her "cobalt" eyes. As excited as Melania might be about her new venture, there's one man...

Housekeeping Unsure How Long It Will Take to Fumigate Stench of Stupid from White House

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Perhaps its current occupant is still unwilling to face facts, but the simple truth is that on January 20th, 2021, a new couple will move into the White House. Reportedly, the cleaning staff at the president's...

White House: Melania’s Jacket Was ‘Just Issuing Orders’

  WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, the White House once again waded into the controversy over a jacket that First Lady Melania Trump wore while visiting detained, undocumented migrant children in Texas this week. The jacket, green and long, was adorned...

Trump Asks Ivanka To Be ‘Fill-in Melanie’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Trump reached out his First Lady today and asked her to fulfill some of the duties of her stepmother, Melania Trump. "Ivanka, honey, sweetie, love of my life, apple of my eye, turgidity of my crotch...

Eric Trump Asks His Dad If Stormy Daniels Is His New Sister

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources close to the Trump family say that this weekend, an awkward confrontation between President Trump and his middle son, Eric, took place at the White House. Reportedly, Eric sounded "nervous and scared" when he approached...

You’ve Never Met Donald Trump’s Girlfriend, Okay? She Doesn’t Go To School Here.

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today President Trump continued his escalating war of words with TIME Magazine and also announced that he had a new girlfriend, but no one around here knows her because she goes to a different school that's off the Hill.  The...

Ivanka Reminds Feuding Mommies No Matter Who Is First Lady She Is ‘Daddy’s Bottom Bitch’

Me-owwww! Things are heating up on the lame new reality-TV political show, President Donald J. Trump! Sparks are a flyin' between President Donny Trump's current and former lovers, and everyone is wondering if we have ourselves a good old fashioned...
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Tennessee Man Cleans Up Quickly After Spanking It to Avoid Charges of Attempted Murder

It's not that he would lie around, languishing in the self-extracted afterglow. But now that it seems like the...
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