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Conservative Wookiee Irate At Having To Dial 1 For Shyriiwook

KASHYYYK, OUTER RIM -- A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, Tibor the Wookiee  -- 345 years old and a staunch, unflinching ally of Emperor Donald J. Palpatine -- was sick to death of what he called...
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Who Got Paid More to Suck Trump’s Dick: Stormy or Jim Jordan?

As far as the world can tell, there are two people who we can reliably assume have sucked Donald...
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