STINK NUT FALLS, IDAHO -- 35 year old Shelly Skalski is just about to take her three kids out trick or treating in the local town square. It's a tradition in her sleepy Idaho berg that if Halloween falls...
NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- The National Medical Research Institute of America has just published a report on the incidence of surgeons suffocating from lack of oxygen during procedures, and the results are stunning to say the least.
At a...
Aspiring satirist Johnathon Flake expressed a growing conviction to friends and colleagues today that what he once mistook for a cynical and inappropriate sense of humor may have actually been the ability to look beyond the veil and into...
LA VALLE RUBIA PINCHE PUTA, CALIFORNIA -- Fox News contributing racist Tomi Lahren has made quite career for herself out of defending the police in every famous case where questionable use of force is at the heart of the...
SPAYNK RIVER BANK, MISSOURI -- In a sleepy town located on the banks of a lesser-known American river in the Show Me State, Johann Jonathan Stroak sits confidently in his living room, a sense of self-assurance permeating his every...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A perhaps confused President Trump began his day this morning by making what he later told aides he felt was a "bigly great gesture" toward Mexico.
"Dear Mexico and Your Mexicans," Trump wrote in a letter to...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, fans of the iconic film franchise Star Wars are celebrating the legacy of a movie series that spawned billions of dollars in box office and retail merchandise sales. The celebration within the fandom takes place every year...
Adult beverage maker White Claw has become quite popular over the last year or so. Thanks its line of "hard seltzer" malt beverages, White Claw has become a staple of middle-class gatherings of all sizes. Their fruity and tropical...
There are certain words in the English language that are categorically terrible, stupid, idiotic words to use. We're not talking about words like the "N"-word, though. Those are words that are categorically racist and also terrible, stupid, idiotic words...
ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- Doctors with the Centers for Disease Control issued new guidance this morning, urging those who chronically masturbate to "immediately consider" replacing their normal "jack lube" with "an antimicrobial or hand sanitizer" until the COVID-19 outbreak has...
