Jack Dorsey

Jack Dorsey Leaving Twitter to Be a Billionaire Fuckface Somewhere Else, We Guess, Who Cares?

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- The tech world was rocked today by a surprise announcement from Jack Dorsey, announcing his resignation as Twitter CEO, effective immediately. Dorsey made the announcement public by sharing an internal email he sent to...

Twitter Won’t Pull Down Trump’s Tweets About Fucking Jack Dorsey’s Mom

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Twitter has officially declined to pull down tweets sent on their platform my President Donald J. Trump, despite them very likely breaching several of their own terms of service. Specifically, Twitter announced it would...

Jack Dorsey Says Trump Twitter Will Hold Trump Accountable When Congress Does

SWILLYCORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- There is no denying that President Donald Trump engages in behavior on the Twitter social media platform that would likely get him suspended from it, were he not the president. Trump regularly threatens, abuses, and harasses...

Trump Asked Jack Dorsey Why His ‘Close, Personal Friend’ @JonnyAmerican4Trump12345 Lost His Twitter Account

WASINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump hosted the CEO of Twitter in the Oval Office yesterday, and reportedly spent a great deal of the meeting asking about his follower count. During the meeting, Mr. Trump also apparently asked about...

Trump Says He And Jack Twitter ‘Have a Much Better Understandment of Each Other’ After Oval Office Meeting

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump had a closed-door meeting with the CEO of his favorite social media platform today, and he told aides afterward that he came to "have a much better understandment of each other." "Me and Jack...

Trump Demands “Mark Facebook and Jack Tweeter” Stop Censoring Conservatives

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During a meeting with business leaders this week, President Trump referred to Tim Cook, the CEO of Apple Computers, as "Tim Apple." Mr. Cook apparently took the misnomer in humorous stride, though, because the very next...
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MTG Claims She Saw Leprechauns Planting Pots of Gold Near Southern Border

Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) told the House Subcommittee on Racist Nationalism today that while she was visiting the...
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