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A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
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Ghoulish Narcissistic Con Man: “Who Gives a Fuck How Many People Die If My TV Ratings Are Good?!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A tubby, ghoulish, narcissistic con man -- who somehow managed to...

Stupidfuck Training to Become Dumbfuck

MORON VALLEY, MINNESOTA -- Marcus Palumbozo is a stupidfuck. He has all the certifications...

Alex Jones Says Trump Administration Can Use Anti-Coronavirus Chemtrails to Protect Americans

CABEZA MIERDA SPRINGS, TEXAS -- Far-right shock jock Alex Jones went off on quite...

Trump Tells Gaetz and Nunes to Put On Masks and Gloves Before Licking His Balls

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Congressmen Matt Gaetz (R-Floriduh) and Devin Nunes (R-Stupid as Fuck)...

Jesus Sees Image of Potato Chip in Bathroom Mirror

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- This weekend, Jesus Hubert Christ, son of Trinity, Inc's...

Local Couple: Sex Was Really Good Until Husband Got Involved

DISAPPOINTMENT GULCH, ARIZONA -- In an interview with Couples Weekly, Tabitha and Mick Garrison...

Nickelback Fan Can’t Tell Who’s Socially Distancing Themselves From Him During Coronavirus Quarantine

COLD BEACH, WASHINGTON -- Pat Jackson is a huge fan of the band Nickelback....

Parents Wonder When Kids Will Finally Thank Them for Gift of a Fleeting, Worthless Existence

HOBOKEN, NEVADA -- Chad and Beverly Thompson just want to see even a modicum...

Local Man Not Defensive, But Why Are You Even Asking?!

OBTUSE GARDENS, ILLINOIS -- No. No. No. No. No. It doesn't matter how many times...

WHO Strongly Cautions Against Human Centipedes of More Than 7 People

GENEVA, SWITZERLAND -- The World Health Organization issued an urgent advisory to all human...

Local Perv Weighs Risk of Breaking Coronavirus Quarantine to Watch You Shower Anyway

LA VALLE SIN ROPA, CALIFORNIA -- Nate Robertson is a 45 year old self-described...

Eric Trump Caught Trying to Cheat Off Brother’s Coronavirus Test

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Sources close to the situation are reporting that Eric...

Latest articles

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...