Greg Abbot

Science & Medicine

Obama Offers to Loan Jade Helm Commando Unit to Texas for Harvey Cleanup and Rescue Operations

James Schlarmann -
In Texas, are they so desperate for help in the cleanup and rescue efforts in the wake of Hurricane Harvey that they'd take it from Obama?
MAGA News

Texas Gov. Abbott Asks for ‘Mulligan’ on The Constitution

James Schlarmann -
Greg Abbot, Governor of Texas, is tired of those fancy-pants judges telling Americans they have the same rights as other Americans.
LGTBQ+

Texas Gov. Abbot: ‘Constitution-Shmonstitution, No Gay Marriage In Texas Dagnabbit!’

James Schlarmann -
Texas' Gov. Abbot might be a lawyer, but his constitutional knowledge? Well...
Religion

Pat Robertson: ‘I’m Not Sure Who or What to Blame Texas Flooding On’

James Schlarmann -
Rev. Pat Robertson just can't figure out why super-conservative, super-Christian Texas was hit with God's wrath, when it's usually pro-gay states that get it.
The Democrats

EXCLUSIVE! Leaked ‘Jade Helm’ Operation Details!

James Schlarmann -
The Political Garbage Chute is your one-stop shop for all the Jade Helm details!
MAGA News

Texas Governor Greg Abbot Is Tired of Other States Trying To ‘Out-Dumb Us’

James Schlarmann -
Texas Governor Greg Abbot wants the first word on your lips after hearing the word "dumb" to be "Texas."
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Latest News

Arts & EntertainmentJames Schlarmann -

Ben Shapiro Shocked His Wife Has This In Common With Every Transgender Woman

"It turns out, I can't make any of their pussies wet either." - Ben Shapiro A shocked and visibly distraught...
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(All Content is Satirical)