fuckTrump

House Republican: Mueller Report ‘Extremely Biased’ Because It Doesn’t Mention Benghazi or Crooked Killary

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Rep. Mark Meadows (R-NC) is one of President Donald Trump's strongest congressional allies. Despite watching his party's majority in the House of Representatives completely evaporate during last year's midterms, Meadows as remained steadfastly in Trump's corner,...

After 14 Hours in the UK Without Fox News, President Convinced Donald Trump Is Danger to America

LONDONTOWNSHIPSHIRE, ENGLANDVILLE KINGDOM -- Upon arriving in the United Kingdom for a three day state visit, one of the first things the President of the United States did was take note of the fact that his state media outlets...

UK Protests of His State Visit Prompt Trump to Threaten “American Revolution II”

LONDON, ENGLAND -- The American president's state visit to the United Kingdom is not going, perhaps, quite as well as he'd hoped. President Donald Trump was greeted with a giant phallus mowed into the grass as a sign of...

Economists Predict Medicare For All Could Be Funded For 400 Years By Charging $1 To Punch Mitch McConnell In the Face

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A nonpartisan coalition of economists has published the findings of an intensive report they conducted, and have concluded that the United States could "pretty easily" fund a universal healthcare program for 400 years just by charging...

Nancy Pelosi Doesn’t Want Firefighters to Put Her House Out Until It’s Politically Expedient

IVORY TOWER, CALIFORNIA -- A home owned by Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi is currently engulfed in flames, and it's unclear at this time when firefighters will be putting it out.  The issue is not whether firefighters can reach...

Bob Mueller Sends Super Secret Coded Message to Congress

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As FBI Special Counsel Robert Mueller delivered his first, highly-anticipated remarks on his two year investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election from the Department of Justice, truly eagle-eyed viewers might have spotted something rather...

With Mueller Statement, Pelosi Worried Trump Loyalists Won’t Vote For Dems ‘Even Harder’ After Impeachment

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As he announced and tendered his resignation from the Department of Justice this morning, FBI Special Counsel Robert Mueller gave his first -- and what he hopes will be only -- remarks on his investigation into...

Trump Orders SCOTUS to Declare Him ‘More Co-Equaler’ Than Congress

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Unites States of America seems to be sliding ever quicker into a full-blown Constitutional crisis, and President Donald Trump told media outlets today he plans to "bigly resolve the drama" by seeking redress from the...

Alabama Democrats Want a 72-Hour Waiting Period on Incestuous Sex

FORT COQ DU CHAMPIGNON VÉNÉNEUX, ALABAMA -- In response to Republicans in their state legislature passing one of the most restrictive abortion bans since the 1973 Roe vs. Wade Supreme Court decision, Democrats in Alabama are drafting their own measure...

Mitch McConnell: “Trump’s Not Above the Law, It Just Doesn’t Apply to Him”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell told reporters outside the rotunda today that he's "sick and tired of the Democrats treating President Trump like he's President Obama." McConnell said that "obstructing Democrat presidents is the solemn duty...
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Donald Trump Finding Out

Well...shit. How did this end up happening, anyway? Doesn't everyone indicting him understand the rules have never, and never will apply...
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