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Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
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MAGA News

CDC Says Coronavirus Feeds Off Trump’s Ego

ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- Researchers at the Centers for Disease Control have announced what they...
Economy

Country That Can’t Afford Universal Health Care Magically Finds $2 Trillion in Cash Lying Around

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a stunning and unforeseen turn of events, the United States...
Science & Medicine

Local Cannibal Experiencing COVID-19 Panic

LAKE MANGEUR  D'HOMME, MINNESOTA -- Terry Homocomedenti wasn't really too nervous about the novel...
Economy

New Treasury Dept Report Estimates How Many Points Dow Goes Up For Every Grandparent’s Death

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This week Dan Patrick, the Lt. Governor of Texas, told Fox...
Science & Medicine

President Assures Public Fighting Coronavirus Won’t Keep Him From Trying to Suck His Own Dick

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When President Donald Trump took to the podium in the White...
Science & Medicine

Nickelback Fan Can’t Tell Who’s Socially Distancing Themselves From Him During Coronavirus Quarantine

COLD BEACH, WASHINGTON -- Pat Jackson is a huge fan of the band Nickelback....
Science & Medicine

Doctors Treating Rand Paul’s Coronavirus With Bootstraps, Thoughts, and Prayers

BOWLING GREEN, CUNTUCKY -- This weekend, Senator Rand Paul (R-Kremlin) became the first sitting...
U.S. Politics

McConnell: “How Dare Democrats Play Games With the Republicans’ Corporate Slush Fund in Times Like These?!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For the most part, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Moscow) has...
MAGA News

Eric Trump Asks His Dad If They Can Start a Charity For COVID-19 Patients

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- During his weekly "catch up" call with his father,...
MAGA News

Trump Slams Reporter’s ‘Nasty Gotcha Request for Comfort and Calm Leadership on Behalf of the Nation’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump lashed out at yet another reporter during his...
MAGA News

Trump Says His Response to Coronavirus Would Have Been Less Incompetent if the Press ‘Wasn’t So Mean’ To Him

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During a recent White House press briefing on his administration's response...
Science & Medicine

WHO Strongly Cautions Against Human Centipedes of More Than 7 People

GENEVA, SWITZERLAND -- The World Health Organization issued an urgent advisory to all human...
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Latest articles

Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...

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