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Tech
You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck
The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
April 24, 2024
Arts & Entertainment
A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me
Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
April 19, 2024
Science & Medicine
Confused Health Guru Contracts COVID-19 Despite Using His Best Turmeric Chakra Cleanse
KARMA VALLEY, OREGON -- 53-year-old self-described "health guru" Pat Kinnerson just got a confirmed,...
April 3, 2020
Economy
Kellyanne Conway: “The Trump Economy Can Easily Handle 6.6 Million Americans Filing for Alternative Employment”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, President Donald Trump tried to brace the nation for what...
April 2, 2020
Pew Pew!
NRA President Says Obama Confiscated So Many Guns, Americans Were Left Defenseless Against Coronavirus
FAIRFAX, VIRGINIA -- NRA CEO and Executive Vice-President Wayne LaPierre told various gun manufacturers...
April 1, 2020
MAGA News
Trump: “What Was I Supposed To Do? Golf, Defend Myself From Impeachment, AND Keep An Eye On The Pandemic?”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- An angry President Trump once again lashed out at congressional Democrats...
April 1, 2020
Business
Jesus Christ: “Dude, What The Fuck’s Up With The MyPillow Guy?”
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- This week, Jesus Hubert Christ was overheard talking to...
March 31, 2020
MAGA News
White House to Begin Reporting Coronavirus and Democrat Hoax Deaths Separately
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Trump administration has made the determination that it needs to...
March 30, 2020
Science & Medicine
CDC Says to Stop Licking Surfaces Clean Like Cats
ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- Doctors at the Centers for Disease Control are strongly urging everyone...
March 30, 2020
Economy
Treasury Department Announces Senior Jobs Program for Economic Recovery From Coronavirus
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The U.S. Treasury Department has started a new pilot jobs program...
March 30, 2020
Science & Medicine
CDC Suggests Chronic Masturbators Replace Regular Lube With Hand Sanitizer
ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- Doctors with the Centers for Disease Control issued new guidance this...
March 28, 2020
MAGA News
Trump Brags That Obama ‘Could Never Have as Many COVIDs’ As He Has
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump is still attempting to guide the country through...
March 27, 2020
Science & Medicine
Town Passes Law Allowing You to Shit on TP Hoarders’ Lawns
LAKE PELOUSE DE MERDE, WISCONSIN -- On a 3-2 vote, the local city council...
March 27, 2020
MAGA News
Trump Will Hold Instagram Live Cross Burning to ‘Make Up For’ Canceled Campaign Rallies
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump reportedly has been quite unnerved at how long...
March 27, 2020
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Tech
You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck
The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
April 24, 2024
Arts & Entertainment
A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me
Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
April 19, 2024
Criminal Justice
Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials
"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
April 17, 2024
Women's Rights
The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus
"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
April 12, 2024
