coronavirus memes

On 9/11, Trump Pauses to Honor the Loss of 1.5% of Those Lost to Coronavirus

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, President Donald Trump acknowledged a great American tragedy that resulted in the loss of a staggering amount of life, but it wasn't the tragedy or the deaths that happened under his leadership. MORE: Ted Cruz Says...

Satan Regrets Not Jerking Off In Time To Save Herman Cain’s Life

HELL -- Former Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain has died, having lost his month-long battle with COVID-19. Cain, who rose to national prominence in 2012 when he attempted to secure the GOP's presidential nomination to challenge Barack Obama, infamously...

President Retweets Breitbart Article Claiming COVID Can Be Cured with Trump Steaks

Twitter has removed tweets that were retweeted by President Donald Trump this morning. One was a retweet of a video that has come under heavy scrutiny in which a woman claiming to be a doctor touts the effectiveness of...

ISIS Trying to Recruit “Top American Killer” President Donald Trump

When America was attacked on September 11th, 2001, planes were hijacked and flown into the World Trade Center in New York, as well as into the Pentagon. The Al Qaeda linked hijackers also took over a plane that was...

President Says Special Kool-Aid Will Protect Americans Returning to Work Without COVID-19 Vaccine

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's not a secret that President Trump and many of his allies in Congress are desperate for states to end their COVID-19 lockdowns and open their economies back up, as quickly as possible. MORE: Lahren: “All Lives...

Vice President Pence: “I’m Just Used To Leaving the House With The President’s Rectum Covering My Face”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- High Priest Vice President Mike Pence held a hastily thrown together press conference earlier this morning. The sole purpose behind it was to, according to Reverend Pence, "explain to the American people and the good folks...

Mike Pence Asks Heaven If Jesus Could Join Coronavirus Response Team

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Jesus Hubert Christ, the Executive Vice President of Trinity, Inc., held his weekly press conference before the Pearly Gates this morning and discussed a number of topics ranging from "who put the bop in...

Trump Suggests Using Windmill Cancer Treatments to Fight Coronavirus

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For several days, and even a few weeks, President Donald Trump urged Americans and medical professionals to consider using the drug hydroxychloroquine to fight COVID-19. This presidential medical advice came despite the fact that Trump is not...

Devin Nunes: ‘Only 10,000 Benghazis’ Not Worth Shutting Down Economy Over COVID-19

DIPSHIT, CALIFORNIA -- On September 11th, 2012, a terrorist attack was carried out on a U.S. consular building in Benghazi, Libya. During the attack, four Americans lost their lives, and the attack has become a major talking point and...

Treasury Orders Trump’s Mushroom Stamp on Coronavirus Stimulus Checks

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The U.S. Treasury Department issued an order late last night that some say could have an impact on when some Americans receive their coronavirus stimulus aid. In a brief signing statement, Treasure Secretary and B-team Bond...
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Tennessee Man Cleans Up Quickly After Spanking It to Avoid Charges of Attempted Murder

It's not that he would lie around, languishing in the self-extracted afterglow. But now that it seems like the...
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