bone spurs

Biden Lifts Ban on Seniors With Bone Spurs Serving in Active War Zones

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, President Joe Biden signed two executive orders related to who can and cannot serve in active U.S. military duty. In fact, both orders are intended to expand the recruitment pool, rather than contract it. In a...

Donald Trump Jr. Anxiously Awaiting Results of Genetic Bone Spur Tests

DUMLANDIA, NEW YORK -- The president's third smartest male crotch fruit, Donald Trump Jr., is reportedly on pins and needles, awaiting the results of genetic bone spur tests he had done at a New York hospital yesterday. Reps for...

Trump Demands Army Promote Him From Cadet To Major General Bone Spurs

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Not long after completing his Veterans Day speech in New York City and flying back to the White House, a furious and outraged President Donald Trump picked up the red phone on the Resolute Desk in...

President Asked If His Bone Spurs Could Assist Special Forces’ al-Baghdadi Operation ‘In Any Way’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Before authorizing the military operation that ended in the death of Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, a man considered by many a de facto leader of ISIS, President Donald Trump asked top military advisers if his bone spurs...

President Trump Wants His Bone Spurs Added To Vietnam War Memorial

AIR FORCE ONE -- High above the Pacific Ocean, on his way back to Washington, D.C., President Donald J. Trump pulled aside White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders and had her take down some dictation. Trump would later...

Trump Packed Two Pairs of Dress Bone Spurs for Vietnam Summit

VIETNAM -- No one can ever accuse President Donald Trump of not dressing up for an occasion, and even important international diplomatic summits require a certain panache and flair for the stylish, which to all outside observers perfectly describes...

Trump’s Bone Spurs Refute President’s Claims He’d Run Into Mass Shooting With No Gun Of His Own

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump, during a meeting with the nation's governors, said that he would have probably charged headlong into Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, unarmed, if he had been in a position to do...

A Statement On Cowardice From President Donald Trump’s Bone Spurs

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump spoke at CPAC -- the Conservative Political Action Conference -- and he pulled no punches when it came to criticizing the armed sheriff that was assigned to Marjory Stoneman Douglas High...

Trump Wants His Bone Spurs Added To Vietnam War Memorial

"If we can't add them to the memorial, can I give them a presidential medal of freedom or some shit?"
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Jim Jordan Promises House Investigation to Find Wife’s Clit

Rep. Jim Jordan (Q-OH) already has a healthy spate of investigations he's planning to conduct as chairman of the...
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