Toothless Kentucky Man Would Never Live in Baltimore

CONFEDERATE FALLS, KENTUCKY -- Sebastian Wilmington is a 36 year old lifetime resident of his small Kentucky town. Wilmington is missing most of his teeth due to a meth addiction he found himself with after running out of ways...

Baltimore Rat Feels Right at Home Visiting White House

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A rat from Baltimore has been in the nation's capital for the last few days, visiting friends and family. During his visit, Whitmire the Rat decided he wanted to take a "once in a lifetime opportunity"...

Some Americans Outraged Humans Once Treated as Property Outraged Enough To Destroy Non-Human Property

The Political Garbage Chute sent reporters out in the field to get various Americans' reactions to the Baltimore riots.
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Jim Jordan Promises House Investigation to Find Wife’s Clit

Rep. Jim Jordan (Q-OH) already has a healthy spate of investigations he's planning to conduct as chairman of the...
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