aliens

Pentagon: Aliens ‘Took One Look’ at Greene and Decided Humans Were Too Stupid to Contact

"They said that a planet full of horse-faced cave trolls isn't what they had in mind when they thought about making first contact with earth creatures." WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a truly stunning admission, the Pentagon announced today that not...

Trump Orders Disneyland to Post ICE Guards at Entrance to Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Disneyland Park opens its new Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge attraction, it's expected to help shatter attendance records. Reportedly, the new theme park experience has garnered the attention of the Trump administration, and this morning the...

SETI Misses Extraterrestrial Communication During “Game of Thrones” Premiere

SPEELBERGH, CALIFORNIA -- For decades, the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence Institute, or SETI, has scoured space for a sign -- any sign -- of life somewhere else in the cosmos. Last night, researchers and technicians received just such a...

Report: Aliens Told Pentagon Americans Are Too Stupid To Abduct Anymore After Trump Victory

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For years, some Americans have believed that their government knew more about unidentified flying objects -- UFOs -- than they were letting on. While the rumors about whether or not the U.S. government knew about or...
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Biden Tells MTG He’ll Shoot Down Chinese Balloon When She Finds China or Montana on a Map

President Joe Biden was asked today about whether or not he's heard the calls from House Republicans to direct...
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