Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

McCarthy Vows to Punish Gosar by Moving His Office Next to AOC and Giving Him a Key to Her Door

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Republican Congressman and Indiana Jones Bad Guy Paul Gosar of Arizona is no stranger to controversy. Ever the bomb throwing, white nationalist archconservative, Gosar has embraced nakedly racist tropes and publicly sided with violent, right-wing extremists in...

Greene Accuses Biden of ‘Wanting to Force You to Eat Plant-Based Bread’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Conservatives all over America are already extremely paranoid about, and skeptical of, The Green New Deal. A new line of attack aimed at the progressive approach to environmental policies co-authored by Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) and...

AOC Suggests Greene ‘Punch Her Own Weight’ and Debate a Potato Instead

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today on Twitter, Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) challenged Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) to a "debate on the Green New Deal." In a series of tweets, Greene proposed the debate with Ocasio-Cortez, citing the New York Democrat's...

‘The Mandalorian’ Will Digitally Replace Gina Carano With AOC Wearing a Mask

BURBANK, CALIFORNIA -- It’s been a busy week for Disney Star Wars news, and today will be no different. Following on the heels of "The Mandalorian" choosing to let actress Gina Carano go -- due to her social media political stances...

AOC Reiterates She’ll Never Fuck Anyone Who Writes For the Babylon Bee

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- No matter how many attempts at satire they write at her expense, Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez will not now, nor will she ever fuck any writer for The Babylon Bee. This, at least according to a statement Rep. Ocasio-Cortez...

Trump Campaign Debuts New 2020 Slogan: “If She’s Brown, Deport Her Down”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The reelection campaign for President Mushroompenis Trump has rolled out a fresh new slogan, and it's sure to create quite a buzz. In 2016, Trump's catchphrase was, "Make America Great Again," though he did try out...

Trump Threatens to Deport “The Squad” to New Mexico

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The war of words between President Donald Trump and a group of four freshmen Democratic congresswomen is heating up, and showing no signs of stopping. Over the weekend, users of Twitter saw the hashtag #RacistPresident begin...

Local Klansman Doesn’t See Anything Wrong With Trump Telling Four Brown Americans to Go Back Where They Came From

BEDFORD FORREST, MISSISSIPPI -- Jeremiah "Two-Tooth" Jackson, a 66 year old member of the klan residing in a small Mississippi town, wrote a letter to his paper's editor this weekend, excoriating American liberals for what he says is an...

MAGA Boy Outraged at How Uncivil AOC Was to Trump’s Gulag Guards

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Bohiggins says he "100% hates" Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, and he doesn't "care how hot her stupid little commie mouth is," he'll never change his mind about her, especially after...

Dem Lawmaker Suggests Concentration Camp Defenders Spend the Night with Detainees to Prove How Humane They Are

GILNORVALO VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- This week, Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez joined a few of her fellow congressional Democrats and visited multiple immigration detention centers in Texas. The centers are being run at the behest of the Trump administration, whose zero...
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DeSantis Wants $6 Billion to Build Bonfire Pits at Every Florida Library

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis (Q) wants the state's legislature to give his administration $6 billion in taxpayer funds so...
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