Angry Pelosi Reminds Trump It’s Her Job to Diminish and Insult “The Squad” Publicly

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — An angry Nancy Pelosi lashed out at Donald Trump this morning.

“Well, I would never use racist language, but I’m definitely really mad at President Trump biting my style,” Pelosi told reporters this morning. “There is no excuse for the racism thing. He’s an outright moron for telling three native born Americans and one naturalized citizen to go back where they came from. But I’m probably just as mad at him for chastising the Squad publicly because that’s MY deal, okay?”

Perhaps reeling from mounting public outcry over his attacks on four freshmen congresswomen of color, Trump has tried to downplay the racial animus in his insults. This morning on Twitter, he insisted there “isn’t a racist bone in [his] body.”

Speaker Pelosi emphatically stated several times that she does not and will not condone or ignore the racially charged nature of Trump’s invective. Pelosi says that Trump’s “racism must be confronted and called out.” However, she said it would be “folly to the extreme” to not also chide the president for “overstepping his bounds by diminishing and insulting the Squad in public.

“If he’d just shut up for a minute, I’d belittle, downplay, and insult their agenda and he could stick to angrily retweeting racist bots,” Pelosi insisted. “But now, he has to get all impatient and stick his dick in my mashed potatoes. These are my potatoes, Don.”

In the preceding weeks, a bit of a rift had opened up between Pelosi and the Squad — a group of four freshmen female congressional representatives. Pelosi is viewed as more of an establishment figure, and the others represent the younger, more progressive wing of the Democratic Party. Tensions started to publicly flair when Pelosi was quoted as downplaying the Green New Deal and seemed to be quite dismissive of the massive social media following Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) and the other women have amassed. However, once Mr. Trump entered the fray, Pelosi gave a public defense of the women she had not more than a week prior minimized in an interview with The New York Time’s Maureen Dowd.

“Look, whether it’s me trashing the very progressive policy initiatives that got those women elected, or it’s hamfistedly piling on Rep. Ilhan Omar and calling her antisemitic when the government of Israel is a secular government and that’s who she was criticizing,” Pelosi told reporters, “the bottom line is that I’m here to knock down actual left-wing proposals from my own party; that’s how it works in Corporate America.”

Pelosi says it’s a “simple matter of the separation of powers.”

“The Constitution makes it very clear who has which powers, and I’m the one with the power to belittle and demean my caucus,” Pelosi said emphatically. “The president needs to stick to doing the things I hate, can’t stand, and find alarming, but will do absolutely nothing about until polling says I should.”

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because they have a definition of hate speech that includes “calling Ann Coulter the C-word.”

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