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Women in Arkansas Now Have 90 Days to Register Their Reproductive Organs

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Due to a new harsh abortion restriction, women in Arkansas have 90 days to register their junk.

Jim Jordan Shares Freedom Fries With the Dixie Chicks While Blasting ‘Cancel Culture’

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On a park bench not far from the nation's capitol complex, Qongressman Jim Jordan sits with country band The Dixie Chicks, sharing a large...

Lying Sack of Shit Hired By Network Full of Lying Sacks of Shit

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Sacks of shit sure do tend to sack together.

Lie-Packed CPAC Speech Changes Nothing and Joe Biden is Still Trump’s President

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In hindsight, former President Trump's closest advisers knew this was the longshot of all longshots; but they knew, sources tell us, that if they...

Matt Gaetz Tells CPAC He Won’t Let Trump ‘Pull Out Until He Finishes’

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A visibly evident and olfactorily confirmed drunk Rep. Matt Gaetz (Q-FL) slurred and stammered his way through a long-winded speech today during the 2021...

Al Franken Offers to Takeover Marjorie Taylor Greene’s House Seat

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ESSENEL, MINNESOTA -- Former Senator Al Franken does not currently live in Georgia, he's offered to move to Marjorie Taylor Greene's district so that...

McEnany Still Looking for a Taco Bell That Will Hire Her

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Former White House Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany has still, as of yet, not found her next line of employment. According so...

Cruz: Senate Should Clear the Former President Because He’s a Private Citizen, Investigate Hunter...

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- One thing is becoming increasingly clear -- most Senate Republicans are still deathly afraid of the man who is no longer...

Instead of a Library, Trump Wants to Open a Presidential Hooters Franchise

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Most of the modern presidents have, upon leaving office, opened a presidential library where they house artifacts and important documents from...

Biden Team Asks White House to Take Down Sexy Photos of First Lady By...

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WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The incoming Biden administration has asked President Donald Trump formally to "remove and all sexy or lurid photos" of the First...