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Eric Trump Worried He Won’t Get To Go Down Big Slide After McConnell Cancels August Recess

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A worried and anxious Eric Trump bounded into the Oval Office this morning, pushing past security and throwing the door open,...

LEAKED MEMO: Obama Meets McConnell, Boehner to Discuss Becoming Tyrannical

Are Obama, McConnell, and Boehner secretly planning to make every militia member's wettest dreams come true?

McConnell: Legislating Vaginae Takes Precedence Over Ending Slavery

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell has vowed to stall Loretta Lynch's confirmation as Attorney General over Democrats' hardline stance on anti-abortion language in another bill.

Obama Offers to Trade SCOTUS Pick for Second Amendment

Obama reportedly has an offer for Mitch McConnell on his SCOTUS nomination.

Merriam-Webster Redefines the Word “Cunty”

The fact of the matter is that English, like all language, is an artform and communication tool constantly in a state of evolution. Slang...

Justice Barrett Gets Permission from Husband to Start First Day on Supreme Court

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- All the hearings had been held. All the votes, for and against her confirmation had been cast. Her oaths had been...

Well That’s It. The Republicans Have Convinced Me. I am NOT Voting for Hunter Biden!

Editor's Note: The following is an editorial written by the Editor In Chief and Head Fuckwit of The Political Garbage Chute, James "Jambo" Schlarmann. The views and...

Romney Had Spine Removed So He Could Suck Trump’s Dick

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Shocking absolutely, positively nobody, Sen. Mitt Romney (R-Utah) announced today that he would support his party's push to ram a replacement...

Taliban Endorses Judge Amy Coney Barrett for Supreme Court Justice

AFGHANISTAN -- The Taliban have issued the following statement, in their words "fully and completely endorsing fellow Religious Zealot" Judge Amy Coney Barrett to...

Ted Cruz Says Trump’s Dick “Tastes Like a Lifetime Appointment”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Scholars of American history perhaps have never answered the question before, but certainly there's never been a need to before the...

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