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Trump Diagnosed With Second Form of ED
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As the votes cast in this year's presidential election keep getting counted, it appears more and more that Donald Trump will...
Lying Sack of Shit Blonde Fuckmuppet Lies It Up Like the Lying Sack of...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In the nation's capital today, a lying sack of shit blond fuckmuppet stood behind a podium, cameras trained on her, reporters...
UPDATE: Ann Coulter Still a Horse-Faced Racist Cuntrag
Ann Coulter, conservative author and race war agitator, is still officially considered a "horse-faced racist cuntrag," according to internationally accepted laws and standards governing...
Federal Reserve Funds $1.5 Trillion in Universal Bank Care
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In bold, decisive action this week, the Federal Reserve Bank authorized the injection of $1.5 trillion into the financial sector of...
Coronavirus Threat Could Mean Millions of Americans Don’t Pretend to Be Irish Stereotypes This...
All across America, cities and towns are holding emergency council meetings to determine if a potential widespread, pandemic outbreak of the novel coronavirus should...
Study Shows 85% of Monopoly Money Used to Snort Pixy Stix
A new study just published by the National Institute of Studying Stuff has pointed to, perhaps, a quite alarming statistic. According to a report...
Trump Demands Army Promote Him From Cadet To Major General Bone Spurs
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Not long after completing his Veterans Day speech in New York City and flying back to the White House, a furious...
Bill Gates Explains His Anxiety About Rising Tax Rates to Woman Returning His Missing...
OVER THE RAINBOW, WASHINGTON -- At the time of publication, Bill Gates -- the founder and former, long-time CEO of Microsoft -- was still...
Trump Rescinds Statue of Liberty Poem
In Trump's America, the Statue of Liberty isn't looking for huddled masses, unless they're white, Christian, and from European countries.
Trump Threatens to Send Statue of Liberty Back Where She Came From
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Statue of Liberty could be packed up and shipped back to France by the time votes are cast in next...
