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Trump’s Sons Are Going to Scare White House Trick-or-Treaters as ‘Pointy-Headed Ghosts’
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning the Trump administration announced that First Sons Donald Jr. and Eric Trump will be participating in a new tradition...
Putin Asks Trump To Have Army Corp of Engineers Install All-Seeing Eye On Top...
"I won't need no friggin' daily intelligence briefings."
Trump Has Sons Barricade Oval Office Door In Case Mueller Pulls Into White House...
"We'll, umm, have Mexico pay for it or something. Later."
Trump Preemptively Pardons Himself for Pardoning Himself for Things He Says He Didn’t Do
"We don't put people on trial for attempting to commit a crime, do we?"
Robert Mueller to Hand Deliver Criminal Charges to Trump Administration Inside Dildo
"This way, one way or another you can go fuck yourself."
Cop Stops Beating Black Man Long Enough to Agree With Trump That NFL Players...
"What are they even protesting, anyway?"
Trump Says He Prefers to Apologize to Widows Whose Husbands Weren’t Killed in Action
"I don't apologize to women in general."
Ted Cruz Sends Trump Zodiac Symbols and Warning: “Do Not Release Those JFK Files”
"There could be very stiff, very swift consequences."
Bob Corker Says He’s ‘Not a Fan of the Taste of Trump’s Dick’ Anymore
"It's no fun sucking someone's dick, if you're just going to get sucker punched while it's still in your mouth."
Melania Trump’s Anti-Bullying Initiative Wants President of the United States Twitter-Banned
"Mainly he uses it to lash out like an angry six year old."
