Greene and Boebert Blast Cinco De Mayo as ‘Reverse Racist’

“…it’s very rude and disrespectful, the whole holiday. You can see it in the name. Sink-o the Mayos.”

The first and second least intelligent Republican congressional representatives held a joint press conference today and condemned any American who celebrates Cinco de Mayo this weekend as a “traitor to the confederacy.” Boebert and Greene attacked the holiday as being “reverse racist.”

We spoke to Larry Calendarpants, a member of Greene’s press office, about her protest.

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“The congresspony feels it’s very rude and disrespectful, the whole holiday. You can see it in the name. Sink-o the Mayos,” Calendarpants said. “And who are the Gen Z Millennial Socialist Commie Generation calling Mayo right now, in very rude ways? White people. So clearly it’s a holiday meant to terrorize white people by threatening to sink or drown them. It’s not the fault of Reps Greene and Boebert that they caught on to the sinister plot, probably bankrolled or at least known about by George Soros.”

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Someone’s gonna tell them right? MarjorieTaylorGreene LaurenBoebert satire #CincodeMayo #politics #politik #political

♬ original sound – James Schlarmann – James Schlarmann

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James Schlarmann
James Schlarmann
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

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