Fuck Yeah! We’re (Page View) Millionaires!

This is an open letter to all of you who are kind enough to read this smorgasbord of political smartassery, tomfoolery, satire and rage-rant-screeds on a regular basis, or even only when you’re looking for some porn in a really inappropriate place. (nothing wrong with that, by the way)

Tonight our website crossed a major milestone in the independent online publishing world – One Million Total Page Views. We know one thing is certain and that’s that we’d not be at this point without the enormous support of Whiskey, Steve, Jason, Leah and obviously all of you.  We know the Internet is cluttered with assholes with opinions. Lousy with them to be sure. The fact that you let this bunch of opinionated assholes “entertain” you on an almost, quasi-pseudo, could-be-if-they-tried-harder-and-debauched-themselves-much-better, nearly regular basis is not something we take for granted.

I want to personally thank you all for sticking with us as we grow. You are most definitely a fun group to get to know through our comment thread chats and PMs. We apologize for sending those ads for our signature line of dildos to your inboxes, but well, you know…stuff.

Anyway, thank you all so much for letting us achieve this major milestone with you. Please keep challenging us to put out the best content we are possibly capable of producing…and for not setting that bar so, so high. I mean, c’mon, give it a rest, Sister Mary Margaret!

Like a Torpedo of Love Wrapped in a Twinkie I Say “Adieu,”

James of The Political Garbage Chute

 

James Schlarmannhttp://www.facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

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