Why I Downplayed COVID Even Though I Knew It Was a Bioweapon From the Beginning

The following editorial was submitted by right-wing commentator and podcaster Dustin Pewpsin. The views and opinions expressed herein are only those of Mr. Pewpsin, and not necessarily those of this outlet.

Well, well, well.

Isn’t interesting how things can change in three short years? Obviously, scientists should never change their views based on existing and available evidence Like all of we good, clean, ammo-hoarding, Christian Nationalist patriots do, scientists should be legally required to just go with whatever their first gut instinct is on any given subject, and never waiver from that position, even in the face of irrefutable evidence. Take for instance, the subject of whether COVID-19 came from a lab leak or not.

For a long time, we were silenced on social media if we even implied that it was a lab leak. It’s true! We were silenced so much about it, you probably never saw a single tweet or Facebook post in this three period from your conservative friends or family members about it, did you?

We were so silenced, you probably didn’t even know there was a lab leak theory to begin with!

During that time, so many people would ask us why we were so hardcore about getting to the bottom of where COVID came from. But that should have been obvious. What if COVID was designed to be a bioweapon?

Sure, we also called it a “hoax.” We also downplayed its threat to society in general, and refused to do things like masking and getting vaccinated. One might think it’s weird that we want credit for calling it a lab leak and then also ask you to ignore that we downplayed it and didn’t do fuck-all to protect ourselves from a bioweapon, but my response to that is so simple and logic based:

SHUT UP, LIBTARD.

And all of this bring us to today, where it appears that people like me, who believed from the very outset of this pandemic that it was born out of an intentional lab leak in China were right. Obviously, I’ve been doing a lot of crowing about being right, because that’s what you do. But some smarmy, sarcastic shit-libs have been commenting on my Tweets and asking me why I downplayed COVID for so long if I was convinced it was a bioweapon. Why did I call it “just a flu” all those times, if I was truly convinced it was a bioweapon?

Well, let me answer that question once and for all for you. I downplayed COVID even though I knew in my heart was a dangerous bioweapon for one simple, singular reason.

I’m a fucking moron.

Thanks, and let me just conclude with: checkmate, Libs.

@jamesschlarmann

Yeah, isn’t it interesting? #lableak #satire #politics #politik

♬ original sound – James Schlarmann


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