Daily American Greatness Tracker – Day 1

One of President Donald Trump’s biggest campaign promises was also his campaign slogan – Make America Great Again. Though many have wondered since he debuted the catchphrase and slapped it on red and white trucker hats just what exactly it means to make America great again, we here at The Political Garbage Chute are always interested in helping our fellow Americans whenever possible. That’s why we’ve decided to track America’s greatness every single day that Donald Trump manages to stay in office.

Our hope is that over time, we can have a real time chart of just how great America was when he took office, and how great it was when he left. Today’s installment of the Daily American Greatness Tracker will encompass three days – the day before, the day of, and the day after the graduation. That way we have established a baseline greatness level which we can then measure against for the remainder of Trump’s term.

Some may ask how we came up with the measurements and factors needed to judge America’s greatness level, and we decided that we would put the same level of effort into explaining it as our esteemed president and his team did. Which is to say we won’t.

As you can see, our calculations put the greatness factor of America at just about 5% at the end of Obama’s term. Then, on Inauguration Day, suddenly there was an instant spike to 100% greatness. This would be astounding in and of itself, but the very next day, the first official day in Trump’s America, the greatness factor shot up to 135%.

We’re not exactly sure if you go outside now that you’ll necessarily feel or see anything different, but, well, the numbers just don’t lie, do they?

Follow James on Twitter @JamboSchlarmbo.

James Schlarmannhttp://www.facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

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