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Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign spokesperson Dustin Pewpsin, who also served as Elon Musk's personal testicular polishing assistant from 2021-2022. The opinions expressed herein are only those of Mr. Pewpsin, and not of this outlet,...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true. At least, she's not a fan of transgender women. For some reason, which only the billionaire Harry Potter author can tell us what that might be, she doesn't seem as obsessed...

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The Bible Belt

New Alabama Mom Can’t Wait to Grow Up and Watch Her Son Grow Up

CORNPONE, ALABAMA -- Susie Grandstrom is expecting her first child sometime later this year....
The Bible Belt

Missouri Lawmakers Consider Changing State Nickname to “The Show Me Your Cooter State”

CONFEDERATE COUNTY, MISSOURI -- Missouri joined a growing number of red states have passed...
The Bible Belt

Alabama Rapist Can Finally Have The Family He Never Had

Sumiton, AL -- Unemployed handyman and rapist George Reed Wambles of Sumiton, Alabama says...
The Bible Belt

Tennessee Considering Law Banning Abortion if Mother’s Mother Was Ever Pregnant

FORT CHINGAR PRIMA, TENNESSEE -- The Tennessee state legislature has joined Georgia, Ohio, Missouri,...
The Bible Belt

Fully Engorged Mike Pence Just Staring at Maps of Alabama, Georgia, Ohio, and Missouri

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Vice President Mike Pence has spent the last 36 solid hours...
The Bible Belt

Alabama Democrat Proposes Mandatory Vasectomies Until Marriage

RÉCIPROQUE BAY, ALABAMA -- A Democrat in the State of Alabama has drafted new...
The Bible Belt

Alabama’s Women Have 24 Hours to Register Their Womb in New Uterine Database

COUSINFUCKERS, ALABAMA -- Women in Alabama have roughly one day to get their genitals...
Religion

Alabama Supreme Court Rules God is Real-All Citizens Must Obey

Montgomery, AL -- The Alabama Supreme Court ruled 8-1 in favor that God is...
The Bible Belt

South Carolina Resident Receives Parking Ticket During Flood

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); Georgetown, S.C. — Deidre Merryweather received insult to injury this...
The Bible Belt

Roy Moore Says Elections Are ‘Like Teenage Girls,’ And Refuses To Pull Out Of Race He Lost

PEDURAST, ALABAMA -- Former Alabama judge Roy Moore lost a hotly contested election earlier...
The Bible Belt

Roy Moore Comforting Himself With 14 Year Old…Bottle Of Rum

Judge Moore tells a prayer breakfast crowd how he's coping with losing to Democrat Doug Jones.
MAGA News

Donald Trump Asks President of Alabama If Roy Moore Can Still Win The Electoral College

"He can in fact not only win the Electoral College and replace Jeff Sessions. He can also kick out any member of the Senate he wants."
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Latest articles

Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)