The Political Garbage Chute

Sinema and Gabbard Form The Desperate to Stay Relevant Party

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Less than twelve hours after announcing that she had left the Democratic Party, Sen. Kyrsten Sinema (Attention-AZ), announced that she and another former Democrat were teaming up to form their own, brand new political party. "Umm, like,...

Op-Ed: Give Me Hunter Biden’s Dick Pics or Give Me Death!

The following editorial was submitted to this outlet by Dustin Pewpsin, a self-described "alpha male MAGA conservative." Mr. Pewpsin is a strategist for the Republican Nationalist Party and hosts a podcast, The Right of Way, which can be listened to...

Sinema Congratulates Fellow Dems on Senate Majority She Will Work with GOP to Thwart

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Perhaps nobody is as excited that her fellow Democrats will hold the Senate majority for the next two years than Sen. Kyrsten Sinema (D?-AZ). At a press conference this morning, Sinema congratulated Sen. Raphael Warnock of Georgia...

Local Domestic Terrorist Really Wants You To See Hunter Biden’s Dick

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Congresspony Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) recently told reporters in the nation's capitol she's "outraged and incensed" more Americans don't seem to understand how vital it is to the Republic that they see Hunter Biden's dick. "Clearly, before...

Tennessee Man Cleans Up Quickly After Spanking It to Avoid Charges of Attempted Murder

It's not that he would lie around, languishing in the self-extracted afterglow. But now that it seems like the Supreme Court's conservative majority is poised to help roll back abortion rights in America to a time before Roe Vs Wade, 34...

“Here’s Why Your Uterus Belongs to Those Weird Jesus Freak Neighbors” by Amy Coney Barrett

The following editorial was submitted by Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney OfJesse Barrett. The views and opinions herein are those of Mrs. Barrett's, provided her husband agreed to let her have views and opinions of her own.  With your husbands'...

Ben Shapiro: “My Wife Told Me Not to Worry If I Can’t Find Her Clitoris, Someone Can”

Ben Shapiro can't find his wife's clitoris, and most nights he absolutely refuses to do so. However, according to Mr. Shapiro, his wife is "totally and completely okay" with that. This is all according to the latest episode of...

Taliban Congratulates MAGA on Overturning Roe Vs Wade

Just hours after Politico broke a bombshell story -- that the Supreme Court had voted in February to strike down Roe vs Wade -- MAGA Americans are being congratulated on their success, though the source of the congratulations might raise a few eyebrows. In...

Jan 6 Committee Wants to Ask Meadows When He Knew Trump Was a Little Bitch Who Can’t Handle Losing

The House committee investigating the failed insurrection of January 6th, 2021 sent letters to former Trump Chief of Staff Mark Meadows this weekend, signaling their desire to ask him, under oath, about what he knew about his former boss,...

Cawthorn Says His Stock Tips Come From The Ladies Whose Tits Bear The Cocaine He Snorts

With pressure mounting even from within his own party -- such as a sitting U.S. Senator from his home state -- to investigate allegations he participated in insider trading, freshman Congressman Madison Cawthorn (Q-NC) denied such allegations. Rep. Cawthorn...
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46th Smartest President Allowed Back on Facebook and Instagram

Citing their policy to be "open to humans of all intelligence levels," Meta has announced that they will lift...
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