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You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign spokesperson Dustin Pewpsin, who also served as Elon Musk's personal testicular polishing assistant from 2021-2022. The opinions expressed herein are only those of Mr. Pewpsin, and not of this outlet,...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true. At least, she's not a fan of transgender women. For some reason, which only the billionaire Harry Potter author can tell us what that might be, she doesn't seem as obsessed...

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Lifestyle

DeSantis Wants $6 Billion to Build Bonfire Pits at Every Florida Library

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis (Q) wants the state's legislature to give his administration $6...
Lifestyle

Punxsutawney Phil Tells Kari Lake She’ll Spend Four More Years Not Being Governor

This morning, Punxsutawney Phil, the seer of seers, prognosticator of prognosticators, awoke from his...
Lifestyle

DeSantis Orders February Removed from All School Calendars

Today, the first day of February, marks the beginning of Black History Month. Except...
Lifestyle

Santos Honors All 6 Million of His Mothers Who Died at Auschwitz on Holocaust Remembrance Day

Today is Holocaust Remembrance Day. It's a day in which solemn tributes to the...
Lifestyle

DeSantis Demands Floridians Call February “White People Have History, Too Month”

Gov. Ron DeSantis (Q-FL) signed an executive order today that will go into effect...
Lifestyle

Local Conservative Celebrates Social Justice Warrior Who Used Cancel Culture and Taught CRT

Today, Jethro Bohiggins woke up, packed a wad of Skoal into his lip, and...
Lifestyle

Biden to Confiscate Gas Stoves and Put Them in Same FEMA Camps as Obama’s Guns

Over the course of the next two years, President Joe Biden (D) will have...
Economy

Ivanka, Jared, Eric, and Don Jr ‘Disappointed’ Hunter Biden Used His Name for Personal Gain

If there is one thing that everyone knows about the crotch-fruit of Donald Trump,...
Lifestyle

We Have Our First Black Female Supreme Court Justice, But When Will It Be a White Man’s Turn?

The following editorial was submitted to this outlet by Dick Richardson, a conservative podcaster....
Lifestyle

I Was Tired of My Kids Being Groomed So I Put Them in Catholic School Where They’ll Be Safe

The following is an editorial submitted to us by Florida resident Chad Beefington. Chad...
Lifestyle

Matt Gaetz is Boycotting Disney and Will Take His Prom Date to SeaWorld Instead

This week, Florida's governor signed a controversial law onto the books that bars discussions...
Lifestyle

I Attended an Orgy With Madison Cawthorn and Putin Really Seemed to Enjoy His Mouth

Allow me to say from the start that I understand it sounded pretty crazy...
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Latest articles

Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

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