Humor/Satire

Cruz: If Women Wanted Input on Abortion, They ‘Should Have Been Born With a Penis and an Unwanted Opinion’

WASHINGTON, D.C. --Speaking at a prayer breakfast in the nation's capital this morning, Sen. Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) signaled his support and even glee at...

Pentagon: Aliens ‘Took One Look’ at Greene and Decided Humans Were Too Stupid to Contact

"They said that a planet full of horse-faced cave trolls isn't what they had in mind when they thought about making first contact with...

QAnon Shaman and MAGA Bomber Vouch for Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Sanity

Despite all outward appearances and her own words and actions, Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) is not insane. That's at least according to two people who...

Fauci Suggests ‘Some Senators’ Wear a Mask to Hide from Punchy Neighbors

Giving an interview on CNN, Dr. Anthony Fauci suggested that even though the CDC has just issued new guidelines for vaccinated people regarding indoor...

Jesus Gives Permission to MAGA to Worship Trump Instead

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Jesus Hubert Christ, Executive Vice-President of Holy Trinity, Inc., told reporters today that he and his father have decided...

Boebert Demands Update from Biden White House on Windmill Cancer Vaccine

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During an interview on NewsmaxTV, Rep. Lauren Boebert (Q-CO) demanded that the White House provide an "immediate and urgent update" on...

Amazon Delivered Crates of Crayons to Mar-A-Lago for Trump to Write Memoir

FAR-TA-LAGO, FLORIDA -- Sources close to the situation in Florida are telling us that this past weekend, several dozen crates of crayons were delivered...

Substack Debuts Adult Content Section Featuring Greenwald Sucking His Own Dick

"Of course, he'll have to probably have to go on Tucker's show and suck him off less, but he's free to play footsie with...

DeSantis Signs Law Banning Democracy

TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDA -- Citing a need for "election security and integrity," Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (Q) signed a law today banning all forms of...

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