Humor/Satire

Urologist Fears America’s Penis May Never Fully Recover from COVID-19 Delta Surge

Dr. Richard Schvantz has been a licensed, board certified urologist for over 40 years, and he has never been this alarmed when looking at...

Greene Won’t Wear a Mask Because It Gets in the Way of the Feed Bag

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Freshman congressterrorist Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) is not a fan of masking mandates, and that's one of the least well-kept secrets...

Unvaccinated America First Patriot Refuses to Wear a Mask or Condom While Raw-Dogging His Cousin

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- In an interview soon to be published in American ConservaFascist Today, Jethro Bohiggins -- right-wing podcaster, singer/writer -- says...

Charlie Kirk Wins Gold Medal for Having a Terrifyingly Small Face on a Hilariously Giant Head

Right-wing provocateur Charlie Kirk made waves today when he lashed out and criticized multiple-gold medal winning American gymnast Simone Biles, who took herself out...

GOP Election Audits Prove Biden’s Presidency Can Only Last Three and a Half More Years

The results of two major pretend-audits in Arizona and Georgia are starting to come in, and Cyber Ninjas, the company that performed them, says...

The Moron League of America Expels Marjorie Greene Over Anti-Vaxxer Comments

The longest-running association of morons has officially expelled a sitting member of Congress, a first for the organization. In a press release given to...

Patriotic American Rooting For Socialist Countries to Beat U.S. Women’s Soccer Team

WHISTLING DICK LAKE, FLORIDA -- 34-year-old Marcus Palumbo is a self-described "über patriot," and often tells his friends he "bleeds red, white, and blue."...

Scientists Unable to Predict if Ted Cruz Can Evolve Past Booger-Eating Fascist Stage

To say that Ted Cruz's political career is unique would be an understatement, given that he is -- at least as far as anyone...

Patriot Will Get Vaccinated If The Sunlight He’s Shooting Up His Ass Doesn’t Work First

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Bohiggins has already fought off two COVID-19 infections, but as he told his audience...

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