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Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However, now that I'm going to be bogged down with extra paperwork if I do, I can say pretty unequivocally we likely won't be rolling through the state any time soon." You...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I hadn't seen in the previous six thousand times I've looked at them." To this very moment, I'm really not sure why she called me, of all people. We're not friends; we're...

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Conservative Media

Tucker Carlson Lands Exclusive Interview With Putin’s Taint

A visibly excited Tucker Carlson announced on Fox News this morning that he would...
Conservative Media

We Know It’s Not a Brain, So What’s Inside Dan Bongino’s Enormous Skull?

Of all the right-wing media personalities in America, none have a cranium as large...
Conservative Media

Bongino Leaves YouTube and Will Exclusively Post Show Clips on His Giant Fucking Forehead

This morning, right-wing agitator and propagandist Dan Bongino announced that he was leaving YouTube...
Conservative Media

Biden: “I Don’t Know Pete Doocy’s Parents, So I Had No Right to Call Him a Son of a Bitch.”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, a Fox News White House reporter asked President Joe Biden...
Conservative Media

Tucker Carlson Will Rub Reese’s Pieces on His Ken Doll Patch Instead

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Fox News host Tucker Carlson is breaking off what...
Conservative Media

Joe Rogan Took a Shower Live on His Podcast and Still Didn’t Believe Water is Wet

FT. STUPID, TEXAS -- Former reality-TV game show host, podcaster, and world's foremost infectious...
Conservative Media

Dan Bongino: “Crosswalks Tyrannize Drivers Who Don’t Want to Slow Down for Pedestrians”

LAKE MORON, FLORIDA -- An angry, teary-eyed Dan Bongino -- thrice failed congressional candidate...
Conservative Media

Can All Right-Wing Twitter Trolls Suck Their Own Dick, or Just Glenn Greenwald?

The social media microblogging website Twitter has more than its fair share of right-wing...
Conservative Media

Disgruntled OAN Viewers Can Still Get The Same Information at Their Next Klan Rally

Last week, AT&T stunned millions of unwashed, cousin-lusting Americans when it announced that it...
Conservative Media

Analysis: 90% of Videos on Rumble Are Dan Bongino Hate-Spanking to AOC Clips

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Recently, right-wing agitator Dan Bongino was temporarily suspended from...
Conservative Media

Mike Lindell Claims to Have Evidence Millions of Americans ‘Wanted Trump to Lose’

Mike Lindell, the embattled CEO of MyPillow and MyCrackpipe, announced on Steve Bannon's podcast...
Conservative Media

Tucker Carlson Will Only Spend Angelou Quarters Once He Spends the Ones with White Guys On Them

Fox News host and trust fund white supremacist Tucker Carlson inherited wealth that equates...
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Latest articles

Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...
Lifestyle

Because of DEI, My Black Friends Don’t Like My Confederate Flag Collection No More

The following editorial was written by right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Q. Bohiggins. The...
MAGA News

The Easter Bunny Plans to Give Plan-B and Contraceptives to Red State Teenagers

"Did you know there have already been thousands of rape pregnancies as a result...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)