James Schlarmann

MAGA News

Scott Walker Says Protesters Are Like Nazis With AIDS Killing Puppies

James Schlarmann -
Scott Walker has some interesting views on protesters and terrorists.
Conservative Media

“That Time I Rescued a Princess and Blew Up a Space Station” by Bill O’Reilly

James Schlarmann -
Bill O'Reilly's war time heroism knows no bounds.
MAGA News

Scott Walker ‘Not Even Sure Obama is Human’

James Schlarmann -
Is there anything about Obama that Scott Walker is "sure" of?
MAGA News

Rudy Giuliani: ‘I’m Not a Racist. I’m a Pandering Asshole’

James Schlarmann -
Rudy Giuliani says he he didn't make racist comments; he was just pandering to other, IRL-racists.
Business

WalMart Announces Bump in Wages from ‘Sub-Sub-Poverty’ to ‘Plain Old Sub-Poverty’

James Schlarmann -
Wal-Mart has decided to crow about raising their workers' average salaries from sub-sub-poverty rates to just regular sub-poverty.
U.S. Politics

ELECTION 2016: ISIS Executioner Endorses Dr. Ben Carson

James Schlarmann -
Dr. Ben Carson loves him some war crimes. Which means he's ISIS' ideal presidential candidate.
Economy

Mississippi Republican: Blacks Collect ‘Crazy Welfare Checks,’ ‘Love Fried Chicken,’ and ‘Probably Wouldn’t Mind Slavery’

James Schlarmann -
Gene Alday has some interesting thoughts on racial relations in America.
MAGA News

Texas Judge Wants to Retroactively Block Emancipation Proclamation

James Schlarmann -
Judge Andrew Hanen not only blocked Obama's immigration executive actions, he thinks he can retroactively block the Emancipation Proclamation.
U.S. Politics

Jeb Bush Has No Comment About the Stinking, Flaming Dog Shit on His Doorstep

James Schlarmann -
Jeb Bush doesn't want to discuss anything in the past, no matter how glaring, terrible and stinky.
Religion

Man With Extensive Hat Collection Who Chose Life Without Kids Shames Others for Not Having Kids

James Schlarmann -
Pope Frank says not having kids is a selfish choice. He'd know. He has no kids.
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About Me

http://www.facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.
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Latest News

Criminal JusticeJames Schlarmann -

Hillary Clinton Circling Mar-A-Lago Shouting “Lock Him up!”

"I told Mr. Trump that quite frankly Ms. Clinton has earned this one, and we won't be doing anything...
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(All Content is Satirical)