James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

Campbell’s Unveils New “Homestyle Chunky Antifa Missile Stew”

CAMDEN, NEW JERSEY — Campbell’s Soup announced today that a brand new recipe will ...

Ivanka: “If Anyone is Stroking Daddy, I Would Know About It!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Why was President Donald J. Trump rushed to Walter Reed Memorial ...

STUDY: The Worst-Run Democrat Cities Are in The Worst-Run Republican Country

A newly published study seems to indicate that all the worst-run Democrat cities happen ...

UPDATE: Ann Coulter Still a Horse-Faced Racist Cuntrag

Ann Coulter, conservative author and race war agitator, is still officially considered a “horse-faced ...

Liberty University to Give Falwell 21-Cuck Salute Send-Off

LYNCHBURG, VIRGINIA — When Jerry Falwell Jr. leaves Liberty University in the coming days, ...

Donald Trump Still Doesn’t Love Donald Trump Jr.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Last night, President Donald Trump’s son, his namesake at that, delivered ...

Cocaine to Officially Sponsor The Rest of RNC 2020

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The 2020 Republican National Convention kicked off last night and featured ...