James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

5 Things Paul Ryan Loves About Medicare

What could Paul Ryan possibly find to love about Medicare? Click the link and ...

5 Reasons No One Listens To John McCain About Anything Anymore

If the elder(ly) statesman from Arizona is wondering why no one outside his party ...

5 Things Ted Cruz Wants To Accomplish In the Senate

The five things Senator Ted Cruz really wants to tackle in his time in ...