James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

Socialist Barack Obama’s Capitalist Economy Adds 295,000 Jobs, Unemployment Down to 5.5%

Republicans react to President Barack Obama's economy having another month with nearly 300,000 jobs ...

John Boehner: “Wasting Time and Money Is The New ‘Leadership'”

Speaker John Boehner will never admit defeat, because Republicans have their own definitions of ...

Benjamin Netanyahu’s (Paraphrased) Congressional Speech

If you missed or skipped Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's congressional address, we've paraphrased ...

An Interview With a Colorado Resident After His State Sold 17 Tons of Legal Pot

Colorado legalized marijuana recreationally in 2014 and sold over 17 tons of the stuff ...

Scott Walker Sorry About (The Media Covering) His Dumb Comments

Don't think Scott Walker doesn't feel about his comments comparing ISIS to Wisconsin protesters. ...