James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.
2606 Posts

5 Other Things About Hispanics That Jason Richwine Tried To Get Into the Heritage Foundation Report on Immigration

5 more "facts" about Latinos that Jason Richwine wanted to include in his study on immigration for The Heritage Foundation.

8 Reasons Why Ted Cruz NEEDS To Run For President In 2016

Ted Cruz really must love us. He's already talking about a 2016 presidential bid.

5 “Facts” The George W. Bush Library Will Lay Out

Former President George W. Bush says his new library will be a "place to lay out facts," but what facts exactly is he speaking about? We try to answer that.

5 Problems Whose Solutions Are Also “America!”

Maybe Marco Rubio isn't so naive after all.

Two Titans of Titanic Stupidity

Karl Rove and Sarah Palin's feud demonstrates one more time that the GOP is more interested in eating itself than anything else.

5 Other Patriotic Things Donald Trump Could Pay For

Other than White House tours, what should we have Donald Trump pay for?

5 People Who Should Be Considered For The Next Pope

Five suggestions for papal candidates to replace the retiring pontiff.

5 Things Paul Ryan Loves About Medicare

What could Paul Ryan possibly find to love about Medicare? Click the link and find out!

5 Reasons No One Listens To John McCain About Anything Anymore

If the elder(ly) statesman from Arizona is wondering why no one outside his party listens to him, he can perhaps read this list and gain some insight.

5 Things That Are Less Out of Touch and Extreme Than The Republicans

A new poll shows that the majority of Americans find the GOP out of touch and too extreme. How extreme and out of touch? These five things are actually LESS extreme and out of touch than they are.

5 Things Ted Cruz Wants To Accomplish In the Senate

The five things Senator Ted Cruz really wants to tackle in his time in the Senate.

5 Things Other Than Sequester That Congressional Republicans Would Rather Avoid

Republicans in Congress are now all too eager to let sequestration cuts go into effect March 1st.

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