Search
HomeAuthorsPosts by James Schlarmann

James Schlarmann

Comedian/Satirist/Amateur Burrito Wrangler
facebookinstagramtiktokyoutube
https://linktr.ee/jamboschlarmbo
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the due process and trial he's deserved his entire life." Life is funny sometimes. If you had asked me a few years ago, hell, even a few days back, if I thought...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However, now that I'm going to be bogged down with extra paperwork if I do, I can say pretty unequivocally we likely won't be rolling through the state any time soon." You...
spot_img

Keep exploring

Women's Rights

Kentucky Republicans Want Law Banning Abortion After Sexual Attraction

Kentucky Republicans join their Ohio counterparts in pushing tougher abortion restrictions.
Conservative Media

Tucker Carlson: “It’s Not Racist If I Call Them The N-Word In My Head”

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Right-wing pundit and Fox News lead white supremacy anchor...
Immigration

Trumper: “Immigrants Should Support Themselves or Marry a Conman and Pretend to Like F**king Him Like Melania”

COLD CAVE, HILLS TENNESSEE -- Right-wing podcaster, YouTube star, and singer/songwriter Jethro Bohiggins told...
Immigration

5 Reasons Trump’s Undocumented Workers Are Safe from ICE Raids

Recently, in Mississippi, officers and agents from Immigration and Customs Enforcement -- or, ICE,...
MAGA News

Trump Rescinds Statue of Liberty Poem

In Trump's America, the Statue of Liberty isn't looking for huddled masses, unless they're white, Christian, and from European countries.
Business

Hasbro to Release”Trumpnopoly” Game Where the Point is to File Bankruptcy and Dodge Taxes

PAWTUCKET, RHODE ISLAND -- During a quarterly conference call with investors, Hasbro -- the...
U.S. Politics

President’s Reelection Campaign Unveils New White Pointed MAGA Hoods

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In 2016, the Donald Trump/Vladimir Putin campaign helped launch a new...
Arts & Entertainment

Billy Joel Says McConnell Was Inspiration for “Only the Good Die Young”

NEW YORK STATE OF MIND, NEW YORK -- Singer/songwriter and piano man Billy Joel...
Criminal Justice

5 Names to Add to the “Clinton Body Count”

When it was discovered that alleged billionaire pedophile Jeffrey Epstein had killed himself in...
MAGA News

House Republican: Hillary Clinton Behind Epstein’s Death and His Dog Being Run Over While Chasing a Truck

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Congressman Tom Thompaulsen (R-AR) is convinced that former Secretary of State...
Pew Pew!

Local Man Loses Track Of Which Mass Shooting It’d Be Inappropriate To Talk About Gun Control After

"Was it the one yesterday, or earlier this week...last month? Shit. I can't remember."
MAGA News

Jesus Christ Has A Message For His Followers Who Vote For Trump: Fuck You

Jesus Christ does not mince words.
Load more

Latest articles

Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
Criminal Justice

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...
Lifestyle

Because of DEI, My Black Friends Don’t Like My Confederate Flag Collection No More

The following editorial was written by right-wing podcaster and singer/songwriter Jethro Q. Bohiggins. The...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)