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Trump: It’s ‘Bigly Common Practice’ For Billionaires To Borrow $130k From Attorneys To Pay Off Porn Stars To Keep Quiet About Affairs That Never...

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last night, former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani dumped fuel on the raging controversy and scandal embroiling President Donald Trump...

Michelle Wolf Apologizes For Anyone Offended By Her “Locker Room Set” At White House Correspondents Dinner

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Comedian Michelle Wolf metaphorically lit the room on fire at last night's White House Correspondents dinner. In a set that lasted about...

Trump Says Michael Cohen Is His Lawyer Sometimes, But Was Never His Attorney

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Trump's former personal attorney -- a man Trump himself referred to as his "fixer" -- has reportedly reached a plea...

Trump Experienced Brief Moment of Unexpected Sexual Arousal With Macron

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last night, President Donald Trump welcomed French President Emmanuel Macron and his wife to the White House for the first official...

Mother Earth Claims Credit For Threats On Scott Pruitt

THE MILKY WAY GALAXY  -- Environmental Protection Agency administrator Scott Pruitt is under heavy fire from critics who claim he has wasted thousands, if...

White House Doctors Trying To Remove Comey’s Shoe From President’s Rectum

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Authorities at this hour are confirming that White House doctors are scrambling to perform a vital surgery on President Donald J....

Mark Zuckerberg Enters 20th Hour Explaining To Chuck Grassley That He’s Not The “You’ve Got Mail” Guy

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A very patient and stoic Mark Zuckerberg, CEO and co-founder of Facebook, is still sitting in the same chair he sat...

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